One Part of Me
by DualWielding
Summary: Sequel to Freaking Amazing. Fluffy, Angsty, Smutty M/M in which Blaine is a moronic genius, Kurt is an innocent sex god and Thad has a new idea for a brilliant money making scheme. Rated M. Very M. COMPLETE
1. Genius

**A/N:** Sequel to Freaking Amazing. Title comes from 'I Will Not Take These Things For Granted' by Toad The Wet Sprocket, because my fluffy little story started writing itself and went all angsty on me with a tiny dash of song fic. WTH?

**Rating:** NC-17 (M/M, T!B)

**Warnings:** Language, sex, mild bondage, more language, more sex, etc.

**Disclaimer:** Nope, don't own Glee, or Toad the Wet Sprocket, but if I'm ever a big Hollywood producer I promise to hire CC for everything I make. Ever. And there'll be a shirtless requirement clause in his contract. You're welcome.

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><p>Blaine had become a legend almost overnight, and he found it completely ridiculous. A little funny maybe, kind of pathetic, and ridiculous. He didn't let it show, just smiled and nodded at the punches on the arm, the fist pumps, the looks from random guys in the halls. They didn't understand. No one did. No one needed to.<p>

When he walked into the practice room that afternoon, Wes and Thad clapped. They actually clapped. It was all he could do not to turn around and walk back out. Within seconds the whole room had broken out into cat-calls, whoops of laughter and a brief round of applause. He laughed it off because, well, the alternative was to leave. So he bit his tongue and took a seat on one of the couches.

It was a week since they 'finally got together!' as Thad phrased it. One of the best weeks in modern history, if you asked Blaine, slaps on the butt notwithstanding. He was in love. So totally, deliriously in love he couldn't have been happier if Tom Felton and Daniel Radcliffe had walked into the choir room at that moment holding hands and asked him to sing at their wedding. _And how AWESOME would that be?_ But no. No, even if his wizardly idols didn't hook up - which would be a travesty of epic proportions - he'd still be deliriously happy. And now he had 'Delirious' stuck in his head. He hummed, wondering if the guys would want to add some classic Prince to the set list. Meh. Doubtful.

The humming stopped abruptly when he felt a curious prickling on the back of his neck and turned toward the door, knowing _he_ was nearby. His body sensed it. That would take some getting used to. The room quieted when his attention suddenly shifted. Or maybe it didn't. Because that would be weird, right? Maybe his fogged brain had just blocked out the background noise. He didn't look around to find out.

He took a deep breath when Kurt entered the room, every muscle in his body going tense even as he made a concerted effort to look relaxed. That had to be an oxymoron - forced relaxation - but he was already getting good at it. The fact that his insides were melting into goo was between him and his boyfriend. It was not between him, his boyfriend and fourteen avid observers.

As he walked in, Kurt felt all his pent-up, restless energy sharpen, homing in one direction. There he was, sitting in his usual spot, watching the door like he'd been waiting, and looking more handsome than anyone had a right to. It was only a few hours since they'd seen each other in the dorm room, Blaine pressing him against the door for one more kiss before they had to go, mouths and bodies grinding together...

The lonely, sometimes awkward young daydreamer had changed dramatically in the short span of his new relationship status. His supple body moved with a new sensuality that even the shapeless Dalton blazer couldn't hide. He radiated satisfaction, turning heads with the perpetual private smile curving his lips and the haze of remembered pleasures softening his eyes. His classmates, those in the know, felt somehow superior as they enlightened the other 'kids' by whispering the name for his new look. Post-orgasmic.

At rehearsals Kurt's performances were noticeably more - mature. Unconsciously seductive moves, smoldering eyes and a singing voice that could suddenly turn husky or breathy all added a contagious sexiness to the group. The Warblers loved their new style and unanimously gave Blaine the credit, hence the applause. They couldn't applaud for Kurt. He was in his own little world, seemingly unaware of the changes happening around him.

Thad suggested Blaine start charging for advice, open up a sex tip hotline on campus. He even generously offered to manage the details - for a reasonable cut and free tips. Because, according to Thad, if Blaine could untie the knots from the panties of prim and proper Hummel, he must be some kind of sex genius. A veritable Don Juan right in their midst!

_Ridiculous._

Blaine watched the gorgeous countertenor head straight for him, oblivious to the looks that followed. Blue eyes darkened, filling with heat as they swept over him, making his toes curl in his shoes. He'd have to explain to Kurt about the forced relaxation concept. Maybe mention the avid observers. He held out his hand with a warm smile. Their fingers intertwined as Kurt lowered himself to the couch with fluid grace, sitting close enough for their arms and thighs to touch lightly.

The whole room seemed to move at once, everyone returning to conversations put on hold. David tugged at his collar and looked away. Nick and Jeff pulled out their phones to text their girlfriends, making plans for the weekend.

Kurt glanced toward the front to see if the council was ready to start, but it looked like they still had some time. When he turned back, his expression had cleared. Blaine briefly wondered if it was deliberate, or if Kurt wasn't even aware he was doing it. Either way, it was easier to breathe again now that the 'fuck me' look was toned down. He gave him a soft kiss - suitable for public viewing.

"Hi," Kurt said, blushing. He still wasn't used to Blaine kissing him in front of people. Or anyone kissing him really. Anywhere. For any reason. He fought the urge to giggle.

Blaine marveled at the maze of contradictions that made his boyfriend the fascinating creature he was. He spoke quietly. "Hey, Sweetheart. I missed you." His chin lowered so he could look up at Kurt with a hint of his own inappropriate eye speak.

Kurt's face glowed. "You saw me less than three hours ago."

"That long? No wonder I was starting to suffer withdrawals," he joked flirtatiously, clutching his chest. Sure, it was a lame attempt at flirting, but the lameness made Kurt smile.

"Tsk," he clucked his tongue and lightly slapped Blaine's arm. "Don't talk nonsense. You're the one who said we can't spend the rest of our lives in bed."

"I'm an idiot."

Kurt's melodic laughter floated through the room as he recalled Blaine saying something very similar a week ago. "I know."

"Blaine," Wes called from the desk, waving their lead soloist over. He squeezed Kurt's hand and got up. The lovestruck teen watched him walk away, still smiling about their first night together, and remembering the next morning...

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><p><em>He woke up early, even though he'd hardly slept at all. He was still enveloped in Blaine's arms and it was the most wonderful feeling imaginable. He watched him sleep, memorizing his face. Memorizing the moment so he could relive it a thousand times.<em>

_When he tried to extricate himself, Blaine grunted and tightened his hold. Kurt gently kissed his forehead and felt him relax, the grip loosening enough for him to slip out of bed._

_He freshened up with the travel-size products he always kept in his messenger bag, then quietly crawled back between the sheets. He didn't want Blaine to wake up and find him gone. After a few minutes he gave up trying to get back to sleep and his lips began to graze slowly across his lover's skin - bicep, shoulder, the side of his chest - anywhere within reach._

_He hadn't reached very far yet when the warm body rolled toward him, an arm wrapping around to pull him close, tucking him under his chin. From his new position Kurt was able to touch his lips to his boyfriend's throat and along his jaw. He heard a sigh and the hand on his back began to rub in slow circles._

"_Mmmm. I want to wake up like this every day," Blaine murmured, kissing Kurt's hair._

"_I like that idea," he agreed between kisses. "Alarm clocks are overrated."_

"_Mm-hmm."_

"_Did you sleep well?"_

_He smiled when Kurt's teeth nibbled on his chin, making tiny scrapes against the stubble, "I don't think I've ever felt so relaxed before. Must have been the back-rub that did it."_

_Kurt poked him in the ribs. "The back-rub," he scoffed. "Could be because you were trying to set a record for number of orgasms in one night."_

"_I did break my own personal record," he bragged._

_Kurt watched the play of muscles as the other teen stretched, yawning, before he kissed his hair again and climbed over him to head to the bathroom. A couple of minutes later he heard the shower start and he was overcome by the hominess of it all. Elation bubbled up inside him and he flung his arms out to the sides, kicking his feet against the mattress and squealing with delight. He rolled toward the other side of the pillow and inhaled. He wanted to breeeathe Blaine, fill his lungs with essence of Blaine. A perfectly normal urge for someone in his situation. Probably. He clutched the pillow to his face and began to roll on his back from side to side, laughing joyfully into the cushion._

"_Um. What are you doing, Sweetie?"_

"_Basking," came the giggling, muffled reply._

"_Basking?"_

_Flipping the pillow off of his face to hug to his chest, he confirmed in a clearer voice, "Yes. I'm basking! Luxuriating! I think this is the afterglow I've heard about. Or aftermath? No, afterglow. Whatever. Here it is."_

"_It suits you."_

"_Thank you!" he beamed up at his splendidly naked boyfriend. _Boyfriend! "_You are so smexy!" He convulsed in another uncontrollable fit of giggles._

_Blaine pressed his lips together and raised a fist to his mouth to keep from laughing at his boyfriend's drunken display of happiness. "Okay, Babe. No caffeine for you today. Come on." He pulled him to his feet and into his embrace._

_Kurt threw his arms around Blaine's neck and gave him another brilliant smile, his eyes shining. "I love you!"_

"_I love you too," Blaine laughed in spite of himself and captured his mouth._

_Kurt sank into the kiss, automatically reaching up and pushing his hands into the beloved hair he'd dedicated an inordinate amount of time to tousling the night before. Checking his handiwork, he found that Blaine's hair was an unruly mass of short curls pointing in every direction. "I was right," he said, smugness written all over his face._

"_About what?" Blaine asked, dipping his head to kiss along Kurt's jaw._

"_A night of hot, sweaty sex brings out the curl in your hair." Kurt twirled a couple of fingers in the riotous tangles._

_He chuckled. "That's the best styling technique I've ever heard of."_

"_I'm glad you like it. We'll be styling the royal bejeezus out of your hair on a regular basis. Now come on. We're wasting water." He tugged Blaine toward the shower._

_They stepped under the warm spray and spent the next few minutes rubbing soapy hands everywhere, standing chest to chest to wash each other's backs and shampoo each other's hair, kissing languidly._

_Blaine turned Kurt under the water to rinse and began to examine the bruises marring his beautiful skin, kissing each one to make it better. He frowned at the distinct hand prints on his shoulders and found purple marks under the curves of his ass. Blaine squatted down behind him and pressed his lips softly to the bruises. "I didn't mean to hurt you." Guilt edged his voice._

_Kurt was enjoying the water running down his front and the petting and kissing from behind. "Hmm? That doesn't hurt. You can do it again if you want."_

_Blaine kissed him again. "I meant these bruises from last night."_

"_Where?" He twisted around but wasn't able to get a very good look at that particular location. "Well, don't worry. I bruise easily, but I'm used to it by now. And I like your medicine," he smiled coyly over his shoulder._

"_You've got them all over the place." He stood and turned Kurt to face him, touching the hickey on his pelvis with a smile. "This one was on purpose."_

"_Just try not to leave them where they're too obvious and you can do that anytime you like."_

_Blaine yanked him to his chest, making the other boy squeak in surprise. "I will," he snarled against his wet, silky throat, sending shivers down Kurt's spine. Blaine reached down and palmed his boyfriend's half-erect cock, feeling it harden immediately, and gently bit down on the strong tendon of his neck. He'd never have guessed himself to be a biter, but something about this boy made him feel primal. _

_Pleasure tingled through Kurt's body and he reached out blindly, sliding a hand down Blaine's torso to grasp him in a slippery fist. They stroked each other, trailing wet kisses over necks and shoulders, kneading bottoms and scratching backs with their free hands until they were too caught up in the sensations to concentrate on anything more than holding each other. _

"_Blaine," Kurt whispered, his breath quickening. He felt the orgasm building inside him, like a spring being wound tighter and tighter, waiting for release._

"_You're so sexy. So perfect," Blaine breathed into his ear. "Come for me. I want to watch you."_

_A sigh escaped Kurt at his words. "Kiss me. Please, Blaine." _

_He placed tiny sucking kisses along Kurt's lips and slowly licked between them. Their tongues met, caressing each other, and Blaine kissed him deeply, swallowing his moans. His strong arm wrapped more tightly around the slender boy, supporting him when his legs started to waver._

_Kurt broke away, gasping. "I'm - I'm close -" _

_Their foreheads dropped together, both boys looking down. Watching that strong, bronzed hand stroke him was too much for Kurt and he fell apart, release shooting through him into the air to land on them both. Blaine panted Kurt's name at the sight of him coming and his boyfriend's long fingers worked faster, gripping, twisting and pumping Blaine through his orgasm. Pearly white strands mixed together on their bodies and hands as they held each other, letting the water rinse them clean._

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><p>Blaine and the council talked over the two songs they planned to rehearse that day. They had a new one to work on, so they'd start with background harmonies. He was offering his opinions on how the group could best back him up when he noticed David's attention waning, his eyes flicking off to the side and a sheen of sweat breaking out on his forehead. Blaine looked over his shoulder curiously.<p>

His boyfriend was sitting right where he'd left him, turned in their direction, but the look on his face said he was a million miles away. Or at least a few hundred yards away, in another room at Dalton. He was flushed, his chest heaving, eyes hooded and glazed. Blaine knew that look.

_Holy hellinahandbasket._ "Excuse me, guys," he apologized vaguely without bothering to look back and hurried across the room to put a stop to what was about to become an even more absurdly inappropriate scene. When he reached the couch he picked up the messenger bag from beside his boyfriend, and casually (he hoped) put it in Kurt's lap as he sat down in its place. "Kurt?"

His head turned naturally toward the sound of his lover's voice, but his eyes were unfocused, gazing inward.

_Fuck. I have to snap him out of it._ "Hey, Sweetheart. We're about to get started."

"Shower," he said softly, his eyes slowly closing.

"Sure, we can do that later. First we have practice, remember?" Kurt frowned slightly. Blaine tried a more drastic change of subject. "How's the glee club doing over at McKinley?" he ventured. "I hope Mercedes is getting the solos she deserves. She's amazing." If the tiny pout on his lips was any indication, Kurt was reluctantly coming back to the present. "I wonder if Rachel still has that sweater she was wearing when I met her, the one with a big owl on it."

Kurt cringed as if he'd just bitten into something nasty, and opened his eyes. "What?"

Blaine grinned, seeing his adorable fashionista come charging to the front lines ready to do battle, innate taste pushing aside whatever daydreams had caused the dazed expression and tented pants.

Kurt's eyes narrowed on his boyfriend's amused face. "That sweater, like most of her questionable wardrobe, is a crime against fashion," he lectured, looking outraged that someone would even mention such a clothing faux pas.

"It's hideous, but it somehow works for her personality."

"Yes. Well. I suppose that's true," he acknowledged, smoothing his hair.

"Are you ready for practice?"

Confusion flickered across his delicate features. "Of course. I've been sitting here waiting for you."

Blaine dropped his eyes pointedly to the bag in Kurt's lap. He looked down, frowning again. He didn't remember putting that there. A split second later it dawned on him why it was there and he blushed. Embarrassment quickly caused his problem to wilt as he glanced covertly around the room, relieved to find no one looking in his direction. "I was – ah – just remembering something," he explained quietly.

"You can show me later," Blaine replied with a wink and stood up, holding out a hand to help him to his feet.

The embarrassment factor helped Kurt to keep his mind clear of naughty, naked boyfriend images - for the most part - throughout rehearsal.

Blaine... not so much.


	2. Sex God

**Rating:** NC-17

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><p>Blaine wanted to concentrate on choir practice. He really did. But he didn't have an active part in the background harmonies they were learning and his boyfriend was standing right next to him. His outrageously sexy boyfriend who almost came in his pants apparently just from thinking about them in the shower. <em>Gah!<em> Seriously, how was he expected to work under these conditions? It was physically impossible to not keep glancing at Kurt out of the corner of his eye. How could he not stare at that perfect profile? Not watch his lips and throat work to produce those stunning vocals? _Music. Focus on the music._ Kurt had far more range than any other Warbler. It was pure pleasure listening to him... and he was so hot when he sang. _So fucking hot. Hnnngh_.

Kurt felt Blaine watching him, but refused to peek at his distracting boyfriend. He waited for a break in his part of the harmony and caught his lower lip between his teeth. He heard a breath hitch next to him and let the plump flesh scrape slowly across his teeth, only to suck it back into his mouth, biting and worrying one of Blaine's very favorite body parts until it was red and swollen. Kurt wiped the moisture from his mouth with his fingertips and jumped back into the song without missing a beat.

Blaine crossed his hands in front of him. _Get a grip, Anderson_. _Think about something else. Naked women. Big boobs. Big, fake, balloon-sized boobs._ He'd be fine if he didn't look at his boyfriend again, or think about his mouth. Or throat. Or how watching his mouth and throat move when he sang reminded him of other things. Fantastic things. Like when they'd skipped lunch that day.

Blaine had taken some good-natured ribbing over it, tasteless jokes about his stamina or something. He'd stopped listening. Thad had simply given him a thumbs up, in a Thadly manner. What the guys didn't know was that Kurt had stopped him the hall after 2nd period and whispered to him to be in his room, on his bed, wearing only his tie, five minutes after the noon bell rang because he wanted Blaine for lunch. Then Kurt had touched his cheek, gently twirled a lock of his hair and walked away.

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><p><em>Blaine strode through the halls toward his dorm with unseemly haste when the bell finally rang, would have sprinted if he thought he could get away with it, and was ready with a minute to spare.<em>

_Kurt let himself in and locked the door, his eyes roving approvingly over his boyfriend's not-quite-nude form stretched out on the bed. The blue and red striped tie had never looked so good. He spent a few moments enjoying the view, Blaine's arousal growing longer and harder, then walked slowly to the bed. Setting his bag down on firm, muscled thighs, he reached into it for a dark blue silk scarf. _

_One end of the scarf tickled Blaine's hip as he set the bag aside. Kurt left it dangling from his fingertips and slowly trailed the soft, slightly sheer fabric all around Blaine's cock, up his body, over his face and higher to loop around the bed rail. Picking up the other boy's hands, he guided them above his head and helped him grip the ends of the scarf in his fists. _

_Blaine looked at him questioningly, but Kurt simply twirled his hair again and brushed a finger along his jaw, down his throat to wrap loosely around the tie. His hand skimmed downward, knuckles grazing Blaine's flesh. There was a challenging glint in his eye as he carefully straightened the tie._

_Kurt held his gaze, running a feathery touch up and down the length of Blaine's hard cock as he bent over to place a light, teasing kiss on his lips."Don't let go," was his soft warning._

_Blaine looped the fabric around his hands without argument. He was starting to tremble, but he would damn well not let go._

_Kurt sat by his chest, facing Blaine's feet and admiring the delicious treat laid out for him. He palmed him, closing his eyes. He'd never tire of the feel of steely hardness encased in velvet soft skin. His fingers continued to rub along the length, very gently tugging at the skin around the base of his cock and sliding down to cup his balls. He weighed them in his palm and brought his other hand over to encase them from the top, massaging the heavy sac. He could feel the change, the scrotum beginning to tighten._

_His hands separated, one going up to circle and stroke the thick cock, while the other moved lower, massaging Blaine's perineum, coasting from testicles to tight hole, teasing the sensitive entrance._

_Blaine's pulse raced and his hips rocked, slowly thrusting against the hands working him over. He watched Kurt bend forward at the waist and could feel the other boy's tie swishing around on his skin. He couldn't see his lover's face from this angle, or what was happening to him. He could only feel._

_Kurt turned his head to plant wet, sucking kisses along the side, tasting the warm flesh and licking everywhere. His lips swept over the juncture of head and shaft and he flattened his tongue to rub up and down on that spot, making Blaine groan with need._

_He lifted the stiff member to lick and suck all around the head, feeling the shape and texture with his mouth, darting his tongue into the slit. Kurt's erection strained against the seam of his pants. He ignored it. This was for Blaine. _

_He sucked more into the heat of his mouth, swirling his tongue, getting him wet, and kept going until it hit his throat. He straightened his neck, relaxed his throat and slowly took every inch, his own cock aching as he listened to Blaine's moans. Pulling back, he stroked with his thumb and index finger circled around the shaft just under his lips and quickly deep-throated him again._

_Blaine was shaking, his head thrown back, biceps bulging with the effort of holding onto the scarf when he wanted so badly to put his hands on his boyfriend. The pleasure tore through him, making his back arch. His legs were spreading and stretching out, feet pointing downward, the muscles tense and bunched. Kurt had been going down on him nightly, getting better and better, but he hadn't swallowed his whole cock before. _

_Kurt sucked and stroked, dragging his lips up the shaft and diving back down, but in this position he couldn't go as fast as he wanted. He slid his hands down to Blaine's hips and tugged, urging him to move._

_Blaine sucked in a harsh breath. He was so far gone he thought he must have misunderstood. He raised his hips slightly, testing Kurt's reaction. Soft hands slid under his ass, pulling and pushing. Blaine started slowly thrusting, gently rocking into the warm cavern of Kurt's mouth until one of the hands pinched him and he wrenched upward. He felt another pinch and thrust faster, fucking his mouth. _

_Kurt wanted to say how much he loved it, but couldn't form words with his lips and tongue wrapped around the deliciously long, hard flesh sliding fervently in and out of his mouth. He ended up moaning and mumbling incoherently._

_Blaine's whole body arched again. Vibrations from the voice surrounding his cock made him cry out and he shattered, shooting down his lover's throat without warning, but Kurt just squeezed the globes of his ass, closed those full lips tighter around his throbbing cock and sucked him dry._

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><p>After almost an hour spent on background harmonies for the new song, during which Blaine twice had to visualize naked women to avoid embarrassing himself, they moved on to their second number.<p>

While the group sang backup and practiced their steps, Blaine danced around them belting out P!nk's 'Less Than Perfect' and carefully avoiding looking at Kurt. He was the only one, however. The others watched and attempted to imitate Kurt, whose swaying hips managed to make even the tame side-step dance moves of the Warblers seem sexy.

Wes found Blaine's behavior strange and a little disturbing. While he'd already decided to separate the pair during future rehearsals so they wouldn't distract each other so much – he wasn't blind – as a friend he felt it his duty to warn Blaine that blatantly ignoring Kurt could potentially land him back in bachelorsville. And no one wanted that.

They went through the song twice and Wes called it a wrap. He was about to have a quiet word with their lead soloist when Blaine walked up to Kurt, put his hands on either side of his face and kissed him deeply. Wes half expected the countertenor to slap him, so he was surprised to see the boy's arms wrap around Blaine's waist and the worshipful look on his face when the kiss ended. He scratched his head with the handle of his gavel and decided Blaine must know what he was doing, even if it made no sense to him at all.

Nick, who'd always looked up to Blaine, had also observed the way he'd completely ignored Kurt, and how it was followed by a kiss that left Kurt happy and breathless. Obviously, ignoring leads to kissing. Deep, needy kissing and probably more. Therefore, neglecting his girlfriend this weekend would lead to her falling into his arms, which was good because he'd been horny as hell all week.

"What would you like to do tonight?" Blaine asked, taking Kurt's hand and picking up his bag on their way out.

"You should probably have dinner, since you skipped lunch today," he teased. "You need to keep up your strength."

"What if I want you for dinner?" Blaine whispered into his ear, rubbing a thumb across his palm.

Kurt shivered, torn between a desire to have his boyfriend rip his clothes off and concern for Blaine's health. They'd skipped too many meals this week. He made a mental note to do some research into vitamin supplements. Meanwhile, neither of them had eaten since breakfast and he didn't want hunger to spoil the mood later. "I think I'm feeling more like your dessert tonight."

Blaine's eyes darkened, making Kurt's heart pound in his chest as he reconsidered. But anticipation could be delicious too. The corners of his mouth turned up in a smile full of promise and he turned in the direction of the dining hall.

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><p><strong>AN:** **No, that scarf wasn't the mild bondage mentioned in my warnings. That was Kurt not letting Blaine mess up his hair in the middle of a school day! =)**


	3. Moron

**A/N: **Italics and bold will distinguish opposing sides of conversations Blaine carries on in his head. Large sections in italics are flashbacks.

**Rating:** NC-17

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><p>They had a table to themselves that night. It was Friday and Wes and David had made other plans. Kurt was indulging in a little light teasing. He'd selected fresh carrot sticks and fat-free dressing with his dinner so he could lick and nibble on them while Blaine stared at his mouth.<p>

_Damn_, Blaine thought. _Yeah, I'm definitely going to have to talk to him about sexing me up in public._

**But then he might stop doing it. Is that really what you want?**

_Maybe._

**You're a moron.**

_Probably. But I can't keep walking around with this broomstick in my pants._

**Why not?**

_Because... it's kind of humiliating. Not to mention it aches._

**Do you understand how lucky you are? Every guy in school probably has the same problem at some point during the day.**

_Yeah, but they can try to think of something else to get their mind off their hetero daydreams. They don't have someone sitting right in front of them, deliberately sucking on a carrot just to get them hard._

**They should be so lucky. And when they are hard, what can they do about it? Same thing you ****used to do. Try to find a few minutes of alone time. Look at him. Look at those lips. Lips that were stretched around your cock this afternoon because this fucking gorgeous boy chose to suck your dick and go hungry all day rather than eat lunch and wait to suck you later.**

_Fuck._

**Damn right.**

_I still have to do it. I have to talk to him._

**...You are so gonna fuck this up.**

_That's what I'm afraid of._

"Hello? Have you heard anything I've said?" Kurt waved in front of Blaine's vacant expression.

"What?"

"You disappeared on me for a minute. What's wrong?" Kurt's eyes were full of concern for him.

"Oh, sorry. I was just thinking."

**Stop.**

Kurt's head tilted to the side in one of Blaine's favorite signature mannerisms, waiting patiently for him to continue.

"Um, Kurt. I think we should -" he hesitated.

**Don't.**

"We need to talk."

**Moron.**

_Stop it! I am aware of the risks, but this has to be done. I can handle it. We are two mature, very-nearly adults. We'll sit and have a calm, reasonable discussion and everything will be fine. So, shut up!_

Blaine finished yelling at himself and looked at Kurt only to see him going deathly pale, the blood draining from his already fair skin, his lips turning white. "Oh my God! I didn't meant anything bad. Shit! You know I love you," he scrambled to fix his idiotic mistake.

Kurt's wide eyes were swimming. Blaine took one of his hands and raised it to his lips with a pleading look, chafing his icy fingers. "Kurt, please. Please. I love you. You have to believe that."

Kurt gave a tiny, uncertain nod as the first tears streaked slowly down his face, unable to speak so soon after being unexpectedly hit with four of the most terrifying words ever strung together. Everyone knew that 'we need to talk' translates roughly to 'I'm breaking up with you'. Kurt struggled to draw breath into his frozen lungs. His chest hurt and he wasn't sure his heart was still beating. _How long can a person survive without a heartbeat_, he wondered stupidly.

Blaine had made Kurt cry. The person he thought about all day, dreamed of all night, needed and craved like crack. The person whose suffering he wished with all his heart he could take on himself so Kurt would never feel it, and Blaine had made him cry. He felt as if a giant fist had clenched around his middle, trying to squeeze the life out of him.

He grabbed a napkin, pushing it into Kurt's limp hand. "Let's get out of here. Sit still for a minute while I clear these trays." He rushed to clean up, castigating himself and dropping things in his haste. As soon as he was done he went back to the table to pick up Kurt's bag and help him out of his chair, wrapping an arm around his waist to lead him away from the hall and prying eyes.

"Do you need anything from your room?" Blaine asked, desperately hoping it would help if Kurt understood he still expected him to sleep in his room. They'd agreed to risk it on Friday and Saturday nights when there were no random room checks, but right now he couldn't have cared less what day it was. Nothing was going to move him from his boyfriend's side.

Kurt shook his head, tears slowly but steadily brimming over. He looked as if he would either collapse or take off at a dead run at the next wrong move Blaine made. _Fuck!_ Blaine pulled him into the first empty classroom they passed, knowing the dorms were too far away. He shut the door and pulled Kurt into his arms just as he took a gasping breath and started to cry in earnest.

Blaine's gut twisted in knots as Kurt sobbed into his neck. "Shhh, I'm so sorry," he whispered, tears stinging his eyes. "Please don't cry. I told you I'm an idiot. I open my mouth without thinking – or even after thinking – and say the stupidest thing I could possibly come up with. You should gag me." He heard a tiny sniffle that might have been an attempt to laugh or agree, but he couldn't be sure. "I love you so much." Blaine squeezed him tight, wanting to take his pain away.

Kurt sniffled again and raised his head off of Blaine's shoulder. He tried to smile, but the effect was ruined when another tear escaped, running down his pale cheek.

"Come over here." Blaine pulled him toward a large oak desk with a box of tissues sitting on the corner. He handed one to Kurt and used another to dab under his eyes for him. "You know I love you. Right?"

He nodded once, his gaze dropping to the floor. Blaine put a finger under his chin until shining blue-green eyes met his. "Tell me."

Kurt wiped at his face. "I know - you love me," he answered haltingly, unable to hold his gaze as he said it, but he felt slightly better as Blaine stroked his cheek. With a little more effort he managed a watery smile. "Don't scare me like that again."

"No, Sir. Never again. Scout's honor," he vowed with his hand raised. He kissed him gently. "Forgive me?"

"Yes, I forgive you. You jerk." Kurt tried to play it off out of habit, automatically concealing the fact that he was fighting an internal battle. "What is it we need to talk about?" His voice cracked.

"Nothing! We're cool. Let's go to our room and make out." Blaine deliberately referred to his dorm as _theirs_, hoping to score a few points and restore some normalcy.

Kurt plucked another tissue from the box and turned toward the door, huffing.

Blaine hurried to open it for him and took his hand when they were in the hall, pulling it through the crook of his arm to bring him closer as they walked.

**Told you so.**

_Fuck off._

In Blaine's room, Kurt excused himself to freshen up and went into the bathroom, shutting the door. They'd gone out the previous weekend so he could purchase a supply of products, the number and variety of which astounded Blaine, to leave in his room. The shampoos, conditioners, bath gels and loofahs, he'd put in the shower, throwing out Blaine's soap and shampoo with a long-suffering look at the clueless teen. The rest, he kept in a Burberry overnight bag under the sink, careful to avoid the appearance that two people were living there.

* * *

><p><em>Blaine took advantage of their shopping trip to buy a large box of condoms while Kurt walked purposefully through the mall pharmacy, picking out tiny sponges and applicators from the cosmetics section. Later, after making stops at the major department stores for Kurt's skin care products, Blaine stepped into the novelty store. A place where fun-loving couples could purchase plastic handcuffs, adult board games and t-shirts with innuendo-laden jokes printed on them. <em>

_Kurt followed him into the store, skeptically appraising a mannequin wearing a spiked collar, fingerless lace gloves and a dark blue t-shirt emblazoned with a pink smiley face and the bold proclamation 'Boobies Make Me Smile'. He did, however, like the pink and black plaid fedora perched on the head of the otherwise fashionably challenged plastic woman._

_Blaine quickly scanned the tightly packed shelves of the small shop until he found what he wanted and started rifling through a surprisingly large array of lubricants, picking them up one at a time for closer inspection. Kurt had trailed behind as he wandered through the narrow aisles, looking uncomfortable. "Blaine? What are you doing?"_

"_Reading labels," he answered, putting down a vanilla flavored lube and picking up an almond one._

"_Yes," Kurt drew out the word. "I can see that." It was like talking to a child sometimes. "Why?"_

"_I'm looking for one that's water-based. And isn't coconut flavored. I hate coconut."_

_Kurt stored the coconut tidbit for future reference and concentrated on the other half of his statement."Why water-based?"_

"_They don't burn. I did some research a couple of years ago after an unfortunate experiment with some baby oil. I don't know what that stuff is actually supposed to be used for, but I know what it definitely shouldn't be used for."_

_Kurt's eyebrows flew up and he looked at the bottles with more interest._

"_A-ha! Found some." He held up a bottle with strawberries on the front. "Want to go home and see how it works?" he asked, lips curling up on one side and brows waggling suggestively. _

_Kurt laughed, blushing. "As long as the flavor isn't too strong. I like the way you taste already." He let his gaze drop to Blaine's crotch._

_Blood rushed to that area and Blaine quickly located a second, unflavored bottle covered with pictures of ocean waves before hurrying to the register._

_Kurt waited where he was, glancing around curiously at the numerous games, lava lamps, vampire teeth and beer bong accessories, along with several objects he didn't recognize. He'd always walked right past this store when he shopped at the mall, mainly due to the juvenile t-shirts in the display window. He heard a feminine giggle and turned to see the sales clerk blushing at something his oh-so-charming boyfriend had said. She was apparently in no rush to scan his purchases. His lips pursed and he strolled toward them._

_He stopped directly behind Blaine and craned his neck over his shoulder to look down at the two generous sized bottles of lube on the counter. "Are you sure that will be enough, Sweetie?" he purred into his ear._

_Blaine bit back a grin and turned his head to reply softly, "If it's really good I'll order a case." He leaned back slightly to nip Kurt's earlobe and saw a flash of dimple. From in front of them he heard a dejected sigh and a receipt being ripped from the cash register. He turned to see the clerk place the bottles and receipt in a bag, which she held out to him with a disappointed smile._

"_Have a nice evening, Sir."_

"_Oh, he will," Kurt interjected._

"_Thank you, Miss – ah – Deb," Blaine politely responded, checking her name tag and elbowing Kurt in the ribs. He snatched the bag and took his jealous boyfriend by the hand to drag him toward the exit. He coughed to cover his laughter when Kurt smiled angelically at Deb, wishing her a pleasant evening as well._

"_What was that?" Blaine laughed, once they were safely away from the store._

"_She was about to climb over the counter and attack. I was merely protecting you," Kurt defended, nose in the air._

"_Yeah. I don't think so... She was asking about my friend."_

_Kurt stopped in his tracks. "She was not!"_

"_Would I lie?"_

_His eyes narrowed, clearly undecided on that point. "Well, what did you tell her?" _

"_I told her you were seeing someone," he grinned. "And that's when you joined us."_

_Kurt took a few seconds to consider this unusual turn of events. "Did you get her number?"_

_Blaine growled at him. "Let's go home. We have some taste testing to do."_


	4. Innocent

**Rating:** NC-17

* * *

><p>Blaine flipped the switch on his small desk lamp and turned off the bright overhead light when Kurt shut himself in the bathroom. He shrugged out of his Dalton jacket and put it away. After stripping out of the rest of his uniform he slipped into a pair of loose, black, low-slung lounge pants and a t-shirt, and opened the dresser drawer he'd set aside for Kurt's use. He pulled out a pair of soft cotton pajamas and knocked on the bathroom door, laying them on the countertop when Kurt called to come in.<p>

He was in his undershirt, finishing up his skin cleansing regime before applying moisturizer. Blaine took the jacket and tie from the back of the door to put away in his armoire, grateful that Kurt seemed to have gotten over Blaine's idiotic blunder.

He really should have known better.

Kurt emerged a few minutes later, dressed in the dark burgundy pj's that made his translucent skin appear to glow in the low lighting. He sat in the desk chair, facing the bed, and fixed his steady gaze on Blaine without a word.

Blaine was honestly shocked. Such a simple thing, sitting apart, but it hurt. He'd rather have Kurt yell at him than distance himself. There was no hint of a smile on Kurt's face. No anger either. No emotion at all. A chill swept over Blaine, as if someone had walked on his grave. He patted a spot on the bed next to him. "Don't you want to sit over here with me? Sweetie?"

Kurt shook his head. "I'm calm now, Blaine, so why don't you tell me what's going on."

Blaine's first instinct was to spout some sort of denial, but he thought better of it. Kurt wasn't going to let him brush this off like it never happened. He'd initiated this conversation and he was going to have to see it through. So he gathered his nerve, quickly organized his thoughts and opened his mouth to explain.

**Remember earlier when I predicted you would fuck this up?**

His mouth snapped shut.

Kurt folded his arms across his chest and crossed his legs in a defensive posture, his face angled slightly downwards and his eyes looking up, straight at Blaine. "This is about the fact that we haven't had sex yet. Right?" he demanded coldly.

"What? No!" Blaine was caught off guard. "Of course not. I don't expect -" he was silenced by the raising of a brow. "I mean I want to, naturally -" a small tilt of the head. Kurt could convey more through a simple facial expression than some people could communicate with actual words.

Blaine's hands twisted in his lap. He stared at Kurt with a mixture of love and fear. Despite the fact that he did occasionally ignore the filter between his brain and mouth, he was intelligent enough to understand he stood on shaky ground here. His foot tapped nervously on the floor. He'd hurt and frightened Kurt with a few simple words earlier. Anything he said now could make or break their relationship. It was a terrifying thought.

Blaine cleared his throat and tried again. "I'm very happy with where we are. More than happy." _Calm, reasonable discussion._ "We've only been together for a week and we already have so much more than I ever would have dreamed. And I'm not talking about sex. I love you, Kurt. Honestly, I couldn't be happier." An image of singing at the Felton-Radcliffe wedding flashed through his mind, or rather, not caring about not singing at the wedding.

**Maybe if you sing 'Delirious'. **

Blaine ignored his stray thoughts. "We won't have sex until we're both ready, whenever that might be, and I'm absolutely fine with waiting. I've told you already, we can start over if that's what you want. We can go on dates and kiss goodnight and build up slowly from there. I never expected more than that."

Kurt watched him closely and found that he believed him. The idea of simply kissing goodnight and no more seemed physically impossible to him, but he had no doubt Blaine could do it. "Well, then?" he asked, back at square one where he had no clue what had prompted this... this thing that felt very much like an argument. He didn't like being in the dark, and most certainly did not like feeling defensive.

"I... um. I don't think -" Blaine felt they'd just made real progress and he'd hate to lose that.

"Spit it out, Blaine."

"I – uh," he started again, seeing Kurt roll his eyes impatiently at his stammering. "I just wanted to talk about what happened today, that's all. No big deal." He tried to lighten the mood, holding his hands out, palm up, and attempted to distract Kurt with his practiced smile, the one that usually had his boyfriend climbing onto his lap. Nothing.

"Go right ahead. Talk."

**You're going to do it, aren't you? Because you're just that stupid. Well, it was nice while it lasted. If you're lucky, he'll stick around long enough to put his clothes back on and not just storm out of here in his pajamas.**

"Well -" said Blaine.

**Moron.**

"Shut up!"

Kurt's eyes grew round and a dull red flush crept into his face.

"Fuck! Not you! I was talking to myself."

"You were yelling at yourself to shut up?"

"Yes! I mean, I was yelling at the stupid voice in my head that keeps calling me a moron," Blaine explained in a rush.

"You hear voices." Kurt's tone was dripping with scorn.

"Yes. No! Shit!" he blurted, unused to tripping over his words. "No. Okay? No, I don't hear voices. I argue with myself sometimes, but not in a crazy, Norman Bates kind of way. Just in a normal, thinking to myself kind of way."

"Mm-hmm. And what, exactly, have you been arguing with yourself about?" Kurt refused to be sidetracked.

"Fine. I'll tell you. But you have to promise not to freak out or get mad at me."

Kurt gritted his teeth. "I promise not to freak out." His expression told Blaine he was on thin ice.

"Or get angry?" Blaine pushed his luck.

"We'll see."

"Will you sit over here at least? So I can touch you?" Blaine tried the charm tactic again, but his foot beat a rapid, anxious tattoo on the floor.

Kurt sighed, exasperated, and got up to walk over and sit on the edge of the bed. "I'm sitting next to you. Now tell me what's going on."

Blaine picked up his hand and kissed it before holding it in his lap. "I love you, Kurt."

Kurt huffed, but felt his anger dissipating in the face of Blaine's nervousness. "I know."

"Everyone knows about us," Blaine began, looking up into his boyfriend's eyes.

Kurt's brow furrowed. "I know." He didn't understand where Blaine was going with this.

"I mean, they don't just know we're together. They think – everyone believes – that you and I are..."

"Are what?"

**Go ahead. Might as well dig a hole deep enough to be buried in.**

"Are having sex." _There. See? It doesn't sound so bad when you say it out loud. It seems perfectly logical, in __fact._

Kurt's cheeks turned pink. "Why would anyone think that?"

"Oh, come on, Kurt!" he cried, immediately regretting the outburst. He saw Kurt's face tighten and squeezed his hand, fearful it was about to be yanked from his grasp and used to slap him. "I'm sorry," he backpedaled. "I didn't mean that the way it sounded."

"What _did_ you mean?"

"I mean we are!" Blaine was on edge, feeling more defensive with every word that came tumbling unchecked out of his mouth. He was reacting instead of thinking. "Kind of. I mean you have to admit we do, sort of... We do have a sex life," he appealed to Kurt's logic.

"Yes. We do." Kurt agreed. "We 'kind of' have a 'sort of' sex life," he quoted. "But we do not have sex. Either way, that doesn't explain why 'everyone knows'," he picked apart Blaine's fumbled attempt at an explanation.

"Because it's so obvious! Because you walk around all day looking like –"

**Don't.**

"Like you just got laid!" he exclaimed, again foolishly ignoring the warnings going off in his head.

Kurt sucked in a breath through his nose, his lips too tightly compressed to allow for the passage of air.

**Wow. **

Blaine groaned, dropping his chin down to his chest and lifting Kurt's hand to hold over his eyes where he could feel tears burning behind his lids. _Help! What do I do now?_

**I'm through trying to help you. You're too stupid to deserve this guy.**

"Shit. Kurt, I'm so sorry," he whispered into their clasped hands. "I didn't mean that. This is coming out all wrong."

"I think you said exactly what you meant. So, this is all my fault, right? Because I look like I just got laid. Well, tell me, Blaine," he said, spitting the name out like a curse. "What does 'just got laid' look like?"

"Please," he begged. "Can't we just forget I ever brought this up?" He felt his throat closing.

"Forget it, Anderson," Kurt destroyed that feeble hope. "In what way am I announcing our apparent sex life to the whole school?"

_Anderson? He called me Anderson._

**That's because you're in trouble, Dipshit.**

He racked his brain to find a way out of this mess, since his inner voice was being no help whatsoever, and came up with a desperate idea. He kissed Kurt's hand again, which thankfully hadn't been used as a weapon yet, and turned to face a very angry Kurt. He choked on his words.

**Fuck.**

Blaine gulped and carefully played his next words in his mind before allowing them to pass his lips. "It's not your fault at all. I didn't mean that." He wondered how many times he was going to deny his own words tonight. "You just look so gorgeous and sexy," he dove headlong into his new plan, which involved a heavy dose of strategically worded compliments. "People can't help but notice how happy and relaxed you look all the time." The glare hadn't abated. "...Most of the time. You smile all day and your dancing is so hot. The Warblers have been trying to copy your moves. All week you've been like a different person." He pressed the hand to his mouth, watching his boyfriend and waiting for his reaction.

"You mean I act like a slut," Kurt interpreted, anger turning into embarrassment and hurt.

"No. WHAT? NO! HolyfuckIdidn'tsaythat! No one thinks you're a slut! I'd beat the shit out of anyone who talked about you that way!" Blaine couldn't wrap his mind around Kurt's thought processes. He felt like a drowning man floundering in the middle of the ocean.

"The guys just – they admire you. They see how great we are together and they're thrilled for us because we're so happy."

**Terrified.**

"They all wish they had someone like you, who would love them the way you love me and isn't hung up about sex."

**Suck up.**

"But we don't have sex," Kurt reminded him.

"I know. But they don't know that. They think we do and they envy us!"

Kurt's face was gradually returning to its normal ivory hue, but his eyes were still narrowed at Blaine.

**Good. This is good. He looks less angry now. More like suspicious. At this point you should stop talking, before you make it worse again.**

Blaine stopped talking.

"Fine. I accept that they might envy what we have," Kurt said.

Blaine felt the giant fist ease its grip around his chest.

"So, if they don't believe I'm some kind of whore, please explain why they think I'm not hung up about sex."

The unseen fist resumed its efforts to squash his lungs. Blaine tightened his hold on Kurt's hand again, hoping this wouldn't be the last time he got to hold it.

"Things like what happened today at practice," defeated, Blaine finally got to the point he'd originally wanted to make. "The way you looked at me when you first walked in, like you wanted to eat me. And when I was talking to the guys you started having some kind of daydream didn't you? You weren't thinking about where we were or who could see us, you just started fantasizing, right? You were thinking about us in the shower. You told me."

**Honesty. What a crazy idea.**

"If you could have seen your face. God, Kurt, you looked so hot I wanted to throw you over my shoulder and lock us in this bedroom for the rest of the weekend."

Kurt's cheeks turned pink again, but he didn't look upset anymore. His eyes dropped as he blushed. "Really?"

"Absolutely."

"...Why didn't you?" he asked, the barest hint of a smile turning up the corners of his mouth.

"You see? That! That right there is what I'm talking about. You're confident and provocative. You keep me tied up in knots all the time. I have to walk down the halls with my books in front of me to hide what you do to me without even trying."

"Who says I'm not trying?"

Blaine grabbed him in a hug. "You don't need to try. You're so damn sexy already, I can't keep my hands off you."

"Then don't."

Blaine kissed him.

**Lucky bastard.**


	5. Willing

**Rating:** NC-17

* * *

><p>Blaine's lips moved from Kurt's mouth to kiss along his jaw. "Thank you. For listening and talking to me, not just slapping me and storming out when I act like a jackass."<p>

"I love you, Blaine. Even when you're a jackass."

"I love you too." Blaine wrapped his arms tighter around him, needing to hold him as close as possible until the anxiety subsided. He kissed the corners of his mouth and eased him onto his back to continue the sweet, slow exploration of his lips. Maybe he'd been unconsciously pressuring Kurt to have sex. But he honestly didn't mean to and he'd show him with romantic, sweet kisses instead of urgent, needy making out that felt like it had to lead somewhere. They could lie here and cuddle all night and he'd be perfectly happy.

"Blaine," Kurt sighed against his mouth.

"Mm-hmm," he kissed Kurt's chin, his lips feeling their way around the cute little cleft then trailing along his jaw to suck gently on the sensitive skin below his ear.

"I love you."

"I love you too." Blaine's tongue swiped against his earlobe before he scraped it slowly with his teeth.

"I want you."

"Mmmm, I love hearing that." Blaine's fingers found their way into his hair as he kissed him again, slowly swirling his tongue around Kurt's.

"Blaine," Kurt mumbled against his mouth ten minutes later.

"Mm-hmm?" His thumb traced the shape of Kurt's eyebrow while he nibbled at the corners of his lips.

"I've been hard almost all day."

Blaine nodded, light kisses drifting across Kurt's cheekbones. "I thought you were going to come in your pants at practice. You should have let me take care of you at lunch time."

"I had a class to get to."

"Yeah." Blaine pouted a little because Kurt had given him that incredible blow job and hadn't let him return the favor.

"But I'm free now."

Oh. "Then what am I waiting for?"

"That's kind of what I was wondering."

The last of Blaine's stubborn fear and gut-wrenching tension fell away. A daffy grin appeared on his face while inside all his nerve endings were doing a little happy dance, some of which spilled out into his body.

"Blaine..." Kurt interrupted his internal celebration and the slight bouncing of his body when he made no further move. "Strip," he commanded once he had his undivided attention. Subtlety obviously wasn't going to cut it tonight.

Blaine hopped up to whip off his shirt and yank down his pants and underwear. He stood in front of Kurt unselfconsciously, waiting as blue eyes roamed over his body.

"Now me."

Blaine helped Kurt back into a sitting position and unbuttoned his pajama top, slowly revealing his perfect, creamy skin. He dropped to the floor, kneeling in front of Kurt, and pushed the shirt open, palms flattening across his chest and sliding the fabric off his shoulders. It slithered down his arms, bunching at his wrists. Blaine's hands grazed over his arms, feeling the lean muscle hidden under the softness of his skin. He pulled the sleeves over his hands as Kurt sat quietly watching him, his breath quickening.

Blaine touched his lips to Kurt's again, licking into his mouth as his hands felt for the waistband of his pants and dipped under it. Kurt put his hands behind him on the mattress and raised his hips so Blaine could slide the rest of his clothes off.

Blaine tugged his boyfriend closer to the edge of the bed, hungry eyes traveling over his smooth, sleek frame. His calloused hands slid over pale thighs and hips, around to his back, and he kissed Kurt's shoulder. His lips traced a path up to his ear and down his throat to his chest where he drew a pink nipple into his mouth, sweeping his tongue over the sensitive peak and scraping lightly with his teeth.

He felt a hand at the top of his spine, fingers splaying into the hair at his nape, pulling him closer while he lavished attention on Kurt's chest. Nails scraped against his skin, making him shudder. Then the hand traveled higher on his head and gently pushed. He placed a final wet kiss on his nipple and lowered his head to lick the tip of Kurt's hard cock. He heard a heavy sigh as he swiped his tongue wetly all around the head. Blaine's mouth engulfed him, licking, sucking and just tasting him.

"Ohh, Gaga yes, thank you," Kurt whispered encouragement, the hand on the back of Blaine's head scraping and twirling in his hair. "Mmmm. Did you like the way I swallowed your cock today?" he asked huskily.

Blaine sucked harder, humming his answer.

Kurt hissed in pleasure, rocking his hips slowly. "I loved it when you fucked my mouth. I could suck you forever. I love the taste of you on my tongue." His eyes closed as the images in his mind and the warm mouth on his cock drove him quickly toward the edge.

"I'm so close already, Blaine. Your mouth feels so good." Both hands were tangled in his hair now, not shoving him down harder, but along for the ride. "God yes. Hnnggh – gaah – oh fuck!" he cried, erupting into Blaine's mouth. His hips twitched, riding out his orgasm.

Blaine licked him gently, hating to stop, but knowing he had to before pleasure turned to discomfort. He lifted his head to kiss his boyfriend's chest and upwards to his neck. He wrapped his arms around Kurt and eased him back down, lifting his long legs to stretch him out on the bed. Lying next to him, he pulled Kurt's relaxed body into his arms. "I loved hearing you talk like that."

Kurt blushed. "It's ok to tell you what I want?"

"Yes, I love it."

"Even if I swear?"

"Fuck, yes," Blaine answered roughly.

Kurt giggled. "That's so undapper of you. I like it... I can feel how hard you are right now."

"You make me this hard."

"I love your cock," Kurt said again, kissing his neck. "I'd really like to watch you touch yourself. Would you do that for me?"

Blaine's breath caught. "I would do anything for you," he said honestly.

"I'd do anything for you too." Kurt gave him a soft kiss and rolled onto his back. "Straddle me. Here." He patted his stomach below the ribs.

Blaine sat up and threw one leg over him, hands on either side of Kurt's head as he hovered over him.

Kurt's mind stuttered as he gazed at the beautiful erection so tantalizingly close. The urge to touch and taste was almost overpowering. He looked up into Blaine's amber eyes and would have spoken, but found that his lip was caught tight between his teeth. He unclenched and licked the abused area, watching Blaine's pupils dilate.

Blaine dropped down to capture his mouth, sucking on his swollen lip and caressing it with his tongue. He felt Kurt's hands slide up his sides and over his shoulders to grip his upper arms, then wrap around his back to pull him close. Their chests touched and Blaine moved slightly, rubbing their bodies together.

As Blaine raised himself back up on his hands and knees and stretched forward to pull the bottle of strawberry flavored lube out of the bedside table, a warm, wet tongue swiped across the tip of his cock and soft hands cupped the globes of his ass. He sat back, kneeling over Kurt, careful not to put too much weight on him. He flipped open the bottle and dribbled some onto his fingers, and on Kurt's when he held out his hand. He put the bottle away and they both wrapped fingers around him, their slick hands gliding easily over his length. Blaine watched his lover's face as he closed a fist around his shaft and began to stroke himself.

Kurt brought his hand up to swipe his tongue across his fingers, tasting strawberries. Part of him wanted Blaine to stop jerking off so he could suck him but another part was dying to see this. He reached under the man kneeling above him, cupping and gently kneading his balls, and dragging a moan out of Blaine's mouth. The hand Blaine had fisted around his cock began to move faster. Too fast.

"Slower. I want to watch. Don't come yet."

Blaine moved more languidly, squeezing the base and twisting his hand around the head with each stroke.

Kurt's thumb pushed firmly against the skin below his balls and his other fingers traveled farther south. He stroked lubed fingers over Blaine's hole, rubbing a fingertip in small, insistent circles over the tight entrance.

Blaine's hips began to rock into his fist and back against Kurt's fingers. He dropped forward again, holding himself up on his knees, with his left hand on the bed while his right kept pumping.

Kurt felt Blaine's cheeks spread when he bent over and the slick cock made soft, wet slapping sounds as Blaine fisted himself. He looked up from the gorgeous erection into his boyfriend's face and pressed a finger into his tight heat.

"Oh fuck yeah, Kurt." Blaine's body rocked harder, his eyes closing.

Kurt stroked into him in time with his thrusts until he was panting for more. He inserted another finger, stretching him and watching Blaine fuck himself on his hand. He crooked his fingers, making 'come here' motions until he found the spot that made Blaine cry out.

His thrusts became more erratic, his fist gripping tighter. "Fuck - harder!"

Kurt added a third digit, fingering him with swift, firm strokes and rubbing against his prostrate repeatedly. He put his free hand against Blaine's chest and pushed him back upright to give them both a better view.

Blaine opened his eyes to look at Kurt, who was flushed, his tongue between his teeth, staring hard at Blaine's cock as he fingered his ass. He jerked faster, feeling the orgasm closing in on him. "Kurt! Now!" The first pearly rope hit Kurt's neck and face and he continued pumping, coming all over Kurt's chest. He panted, gazing down at his beautiful lover, covered in his semen and looking back at him with a gorgeous smile. Kurt's eyes dipped low and Blaine winced as he gently withdrew his fingers.

Blaine wiped a smattering of fluid off Kurt's cheek and bent over to kiss him. "You look so damn hot right now."

Kurt was having trouble wiping the smile off his face as he tried for a stern expression. "I hope you appreciate the sacrifice I'm making by subjecting my skin to such treatment. You realize I'm going to have to moisturize again?" He giggled.

Blaine laughed with him. "I'll give you a facial myself."

"I think you did."

-.-

Blaine spent the rest of the weekend making up to Kurt in his own way, treating him like a prince and doing anything he wanted. They shopped, went out for dinner with the girls at Breadstix and watched a couple of his favorite movies. By Sunday night, when Kurt had to return to his room, Blaine knew everything was back to normal.


	6. Hidden

**Lyrics:** 'I Will Not Take These Things For Granted', by Toad the Wet Sprocket

**Rating:** NC-17

* * *

><p>By the end of rehearsals the next day, Blaine knew everything was definitely not back to normal.<p>

* * *

><p><strong>one part of me just wants to tell you everything<br>one part just needs the quiet  
>and if I'm lonely here, I'm lonely here<br>and on the telephone  
>you offer reassurance<strong>

Kurt lay alone and silent in his bed late Sunday night, sheets clutched in his fists, tears coursing down his face, dampening his pillow. One week. That's how much time he'd been given. For a week he'd walked on air, with no fears or insecurities. No sadness or pain. No wishing for something he couldn't have. Delusional. Wanting something so much that he'd actually believed it was there. A mirage of happiness.

Their argument echoed over and over in his mind, Blaine's words haunting him, because he was right. Everything he said was true. Or at least, the meaning behind them was true. Kurt had stopped the fight, too hurt and ashamed to listen to any more, which just made him a coward on top of everything else.

He had years of practice at suppressing and hiding hurt feelings. Blaine had accepted his sudden mood change just like everyone else always did, because it was easy. But Kurt had heard enough. Everyone knows. He knew what that meant – everyone was laughing, sneering. They all wish they had someone like him, someone who wasn't hung up about sex – a warm body to use and objectify without the bother of caring for them.

Maybe that's all sex was to them. It was more to Kurt. Touching and kissing Blaine was indescribable, like a color. You'd need a basis for comparison to understand it. A person who had never seen color wouldn't know what green-gold looks like, or how it could change to amber – and no amount of words, no matter how descriptive, would ever make them understand color. Someone who'd never been in love wouldn't understand how Kurt felt when he was in Blaine's arms. But, regardless of how much it might mean to Kurt, he had no right to use sex to get what he wanted, and he knew it.

_This is real life, _he railed at himself._ Not some stupid teenage fantasy. I can't just DO those things. Can't do whatever I want, TAKE whatever I want. It's wrong. I'm wrong._

_He could have been with me any time. So many chances, but he never said anything. Never kissed me, not even close. Because he didn't want to. I have to accept that. Have to. He doesn't want this relationship. Not really. I pushed him into it. We'd still be no more than friends now if I hadn't forced myself on him. I'm selfish. Too selfish to think about anything or anyone else. _

_I can't do this anymore._

_I won't let him see. He's too good. He'd stay with me out of pity and I'd hate myself even more. I have to figure out how to make him let me go. Until then, just pretend everything is normal. I have to pretend - for his sake._

_Liar. Can't even admit it's for my own sake. I'm pathetic._

* * *

><p>Monday rolled around, a beautiful, bitterly cold day in February. Blaine styled his hair the way he knew Kurt liked it, no gel, just a touch of smoothing product on soft curls, then went humming along to Kurt's dorm so they could walk to breakfast together.<p>

Kurt came out carrying a couple of books in addition to the bag slung over his shoulder, called a farewell to his roommate and shut the door behind him, glancing up and down the hallway.

"Good morning, Gorgeous," Blaine greeted him cheerfully and went in for his morning kiss. Kurt gave him a quick peck on the lips before turning to walk down the hall, Blaine hurrying to catch up. He wanted to hold his boyfriend's hand, but his arms were wrapped around the books he held to his chest.

"Do you need any help carrying those?" Blaine offered.

"No, thank you. They're fine. I just have some homework to catch up on. I should have done it over the weekend," he scolded himself.

"Oh. Sorry. I guess I should have asked before I suggested watching 'My Fair Lady_'_ last night."

"It's my own fault. I need to spend more time concentrating on my school work and less time fooling around." He blushed, still looking straight ahead. "I mean I need to get my work done before I allow myself to do other things."

"Definitely... Yeah, so do I," Blaine said, sensing that he should agree with his boyfriend and suddenly feeling as if he'd done something wrong. He'd apologize if he knew what to apologize for. Simply saying I'm sorry might work with a lot of people, but Kurt wasn't a lot of people. He'd demand an explanation, an 'I'm sorry for [fill in your dumbass mistake here and you'd better get it right]' type of apology.

He'd already said he was sorry for watching a movie when they probably should have been studying. Maybe that was enough? Blaine's luck just didn't seem to be running in that direction lately.

"I have a research paper to work on for English," Blaine said, even though the first draft wasn't due for three weeks. If he couldn't offer an apology he'd offer support. "We should get in a couple of hours of study time tonight."

"Fine. We can work in the library then, after dinner."

"Okay," Blaine quietly agreed. He knew as well as Kurt did that they didn't get much studying done alone in his room anymore, but it was disappointing to know his boyfriend didn't plan to allow their usual interruptions this time.

Kurt was preoccupied throughout breakfast, darting glances around the room, giving mono-syllabic responses to Blaine's attempts to spark a conversation and declaring he was fine when Blaine asked if something was wrong. As they walked out afterward, Kurt's arms once again held his books to his chest, leaving Blaine with a bereft feeling and an empty, fidgety hand, which he finally stuck into the pocket of his slacks.

Before they separated to go to their classes he leaned in for another kiss, missing Kurt's lips and landing awkwardly on his cheek. "So. I'll see you at lunch?" Blaine asked, feeling less than confident the answer would be the usual, enthusiastic yes.

"Yeah, see you then. Gotta go. Bye," Kurt muttered distractedly and walked away.

**how can I hold the part of me that only you can carry  
>it needs a strength I haven't found<br>but if it's frightening, I'll bear the cold  
>and on the telephone<br>you offer warm asylum**

_I want him too much. Why can't I stop? I have to stop. It's not normal. There's something wrong with me. I'm weak. He deserves better. He should be with someone as strong and beautiful and amazing as he is._

* * *

><p>Lunch was basically a repeat of breakfast, with a distracted boyfriend, no kiss and not much of a smile. Blaine was starting to freak out, but he didn't know what to do about it because Kurt wouldn't tell him what was wrong. Wouldn't even admit something <em>was<em> wrong. Choir practice was even worse. Kurt was reserved, his singing muted, his dance steps mechanical. The entire group was thrown off balance. Fortunately, it was a closed rehearsal. No one was there to witness the Warblers looking like a room full of nervous freshman on their first day. After an hour Wes decided to put them all out of their misery, unable to do a thing with them and believing it was a waste of time to keep trying. David and Thad didn't argue.

As soon as they were dismissed, Kurt went to grab his bag, telling Blaine he needed another book from his room and he'd see him at dinner before hurrying out of the room.

**I'm listening  
>flowers in the garden<br>laughter in the hall  
>children in the park<br>I will not take these things for granted  
>anymore<strong>

_They're watching me. I know they are. All of them. Eyes on me wherever I go. Just look up, eyes straight ahead. Don't look at them. Keep walking. Don't cry. Don't cry yet._

Blaine stood rooted in place after Kurt tossed him an excuse and walked out without a backward glance. He was still standing there as the room cleared and he felt Wes, David and Thad come up beside him.

All four boys gazed toward the open doors, Thad draping an arm over Blaine's shoulders. "What the hell, Dude?" Thad tended to get straight to the point. It was one of his best, and most annoying qualities.

"What?" Blaine asked, knowing perfectly well what Thad meant.

"Did you two have a fight or what? Because the ice princess definitely just brushed you off."

"No. We didn't have a fight - exactly. I don't know what's going on," Blaine said, genuinely confused. "And don't call him that. Everything was fine over the weekend, but today he's quiet. He looks tired too. He's got something on his mind, I guess. Maybe his dad's sick again, I don't know."

"You don't know? Wouldn't you be like the first person he talked to if his dad were sick?" Thad pointed out the obvious flaw in that theory.

"Probably," he sighed. "It's something else then. Maybe he's helping one of his old glee club friends with a personal problem and they asked him not to talk about it," he hedged, trying to come up with a reasonable explanation for Kurt's behavior, but not sure he convinced himself, let alone the others.

"Yeah, okay. Keep telling yourself that," Thad rolled his eyes and gave his friend a sympathetic pat on the back.

Blaine turned to the other two, hoping they'd be more reassuring. They looked at him with identical expressions of pity.

One week later...

"Dude! What the hell!" Thad exclaimed as, once again, Kurt walked out after practice, leaving a slack-jawed Blaine behind.

Wes spoke up. "Thad, that really isn't helping. Blaine, it's been a week. Haven't you talked to him yet about what's bothering him?"

"It's obvious there's a problem," David chimed in. "Has he told you anything? Is he planning to break up with you?"

"What? No! When we're alone everything's great. He's all over me."

Wes's eyebrows shot up and Thad grinned. "Details, man. We need details." David punched him in the arm.

Blaine fired poisonous eye darts at his soon-to-be-former friend. "I meant he's totally normal, you know? Sweet and talkative. Bossy even, like always. He went home for the weekend and when he got back last night, believe me he was fine. So very fine." David punched Thad as he opened his mouth to speak again.

"But, as soon as we're around other people he clams up and hides behind this shell," Blaine gestured vaguely toward the doors. He honestly had no idea why Kurt was suddenly this dual personality. When they were alone he was fine and refused to acknowledge that anything might be bothering him. When they weren't alone, he seemed tense and uncomfortable, but Blaine wasn't about to start a serious discussion in front of anyone else.

"Well, it's screwing up our new routine. The routine that's guaranteed to score us points at Regionals - not to mention some fangirls - which I, for one, do not want to see screwed up. So DO something," Thad said.

"Like what?" Blaine asked, wishing someone would give him an actual idea.

"Fix it!" Thad advised, as helpful as ever.

"Shut up, Thad," David and Wes said.

"Something must have triggered this behavior," Wes offered his amateur analysis. "And whatever you've tried over the past week hasn't worked. Please give it some thought and come up with a new tactic so rehearsals can get back to normal."

Blaine turned his glare on Wes. "Thank you for your evident concern about Kurt," he bit out sarcastically. He expected comments like that from Thad, who was never more than half serious, but to hear it from Wes actually hurt. Nevertheless, his friend's words stayed with him as he walked slowly to dinner. _Try something different_, he thought. He just had to figure out what to try.


	7. Brave

**Rating:** NC-17

* * *

><p>On Thursday night Blaine kicked off his plan, such as it was. "Would you like to go out tomorrow night?" he asked as they lay in bed, Kurt curled against his side, the boys having finished their homework as fast as possible and followed it with a heated make-out session. "There's a theater in Dayton putting on a production of 'Grease' that's getting really good reviews. If we skip rehearsal and leave right after class we should make it to the city in time for dinner before the show starts."<p>

Kurt rose onto his elbow, his smiling face shining down on Blaine. "That sounds fantastic! Are you sure it isn't sold out?"

"Actually, I reserved our tickets a few days ago. I just wanted to surprise you. Valentine's Day is next week and I thought we'd celebrate a little early."

"You are so sweet. Thank you." He gave Blaine a quick hug and kiss before climbing out of bed.

"Where are you going?" Blaine looked at the clock. They still had almost an hour before curfew.

"If we're going to leave right after last period tomorrow, I have to pull options for my outfit tonight," Kurt stated the obvious as he started pulling on his clothes.

"Oh, right. Of course. Well, pack an overnight bag too because it'll be a little late to drive back here after the show. I'll book us a room somewhere near the theater."

"That would be fabulous! Then on Saturday we can do some shopping before we come back," he hopped up and down excitedly. "There's a big mall in Dayton."

"Sounds perfect," Blaine smiled indulgently.

"Oh!" Kurt gushed, clapping his hands together. "I finally get to show off my new Jeffery-West Tomasso boots! Which pants will I wear?" he talked to himself as he dressed. "And I need something for Saturday too. Oh, there's so much to do! Why didn't you tell me sooner?" he fussed, without stopping to slant an accusing look at his boyfriend. There was no time for that. "It had better not snow tomorrow. Oh, my gosh. I have to call Dad, and make sure I remember my sunglasses, and my grey scarf."

"Wait. What?"

"My grey scarf. You know, the cashmere one Dad and Carole got me for Christmas. I wore it when we went for coffee a couple of weeks ago."

Blaine actually had known which scarf he meant, but that wasn't the point. "No. You have to call your dad?"

"Of course. I have to let him know if I'm going to be in Dayton overnight. Don't worry. He knows all about us."

"What?" Blaine's face was a mask of concerned shock. His eyes darted toward the door, expecting an irate father to start pounding on it any second.

"Well, not _all_ about us. But he knows we're dating and I've told him what a perfect gentleman you are."

Blaine, lying naked on the bed while his boyfriend hurriedly dressed, was not totally convinced. "But, if you tell him we're spending the night in the city..."

"Please. He already gave me 'the talk' last weekend," Kurt rolled his eyes while putting on his socks. "Awkward. But not to worry. If he has a problem with it I'll just tell him it's no different than being here where we hang out alone in your room every night."

"What!"

"Honey, I really don't have time for your hysterics right now. I can handle my father. And he'd never actually harm you, you know. Karofsky, yes. Or Puck, maybe, but not you. You're so charming and harmless looking. I'm just going to grab my supplies from the bathroom since they're already packed."

"Why do I feel like I've just been insulted?" Blaine asked the empty air as Kurt skipped into the bathroom. "Wait. Puck? Isn't he straight?"

"Of course. Probably. I don't know. He might not be that picky. I just meant he isn't exactly father-friendly boyfriend material like you. Okay, I've got to run. Million things to do! See you tomorrow morning. Love you," he said, dropping a hard kiss on Blaine's lips before whisking out the door, humming to himself.

* * *

><p><strong>to crawl inside the wire and feel something near me<br>to feel this accepting  
>that it is lonely here, but not alone<br>and on the telephone  
>you offer visions dancing<strong>

The smile slowly faded as he hurried to his room. He'd forgotten. For a few precious minutes he'd felt good again. Everything had felt perfect and right.

_I've done so much faking that I'm starting to fool myself. _

_I'll go with him tomorrow. After that I'll talk to my father about leaving Dalton. Blaine won't feel responsible for me if I'm not here anymore. He'll meet someone else. And I'll have my memories of him. Nothing can take those away. That will be enough for me._

_Dad will think it's strange. I've told him I'm happy here. He knows about Blaine. I'll explain that we've decided to just be friends, that I want to go back to McKinley because I miss my girls. And I miss being at home. I'll tell him I'm not afraid of Karofsky anymore. And I'm really not. I don't know when it happened, but I'm not afraid of him. He threatened me and I took it seriously. Idle threats. He's a bully. That's what they do, mess with your head. If he ever touches me again I'll bitch-slap the sneer right off his face. And if that doesn't do it, I'll remind him that I'm a kicker and I know where his balls are. My father will be proud of me, and that will help make up for the pain of leaving here._

Blaine made hotel reservations after Kurt left, then packed a bag while he thought about their problem and how to resolve it. He'd gone over and over it in his mind and he couldn't think of anything that might have happened to cause Kurt's behavior other than their argument. He winced inwardly at the word. It was never supposed to be a fight. It was supposed to be a conversation, a mature discussion, just to bring a few things to his attention. So much for that brilliant idea.

At first Blaine had shied away from the thought that his stupid determination to get Kurt to show more reserve had only ended in making him miserable. Part of him had known all along, but he didn't want to accept it. Kurt had been so blissfully happy. Now he was self-conscious and sad. Blaine had taken his blinders off and there was no way to put them on again - they'd have to move forward from here. He was sure it would get better with time. They'd ease back into public displays of affection and Kurt would eventually stop caring what other people might or might not think, as long as they were together.

* * *

><p>Blaine held Kurt's hand as they walked out to the car after the show. Kurt was laughing and bouncing along beside him. It felt so good to hold his hand and hear him laugh again that Blaine was almost giddy. He really hoped some time away from school, just the two of them, would help Kurt start to relax and get his confidence back.<p>

"That was so much fun!" Kurt stopped hopping long enough to turn slightly and curl his free hand around Blaine's arm. "Thank you."

"Thank you for saying yes. We need to go out more often. I'm having a great time and I thought they did really well, didn't you?"

"Oh, yes. They had a couple of strong singers. They've got nothing on us, though. Couldn't you just picture us on stage? Oh wow, Santana would make an outstanding Rizzo. And Britt would be a good Frenchy. Finn or Puck could play Kenickie. You'd be Danny, of course. You already have the hair gel," he snickered.

"And who would be my leading lady?"

"Me, Silly! Who do you think?" Kurt laughed again and launched into 'Summer Nights' as they climbed into the car.

Blaine joined in as the GPS guided him to their hotel. Maybe they really should put on their own production of 'Grease' if it made Kurt this happy, he thought. But of course, Kurt – as Sandy – might not get the rave reviews he deserved in small-town Ohio. He belonged in New York. And Blaine would be right there with him, his biggest fan.

They found the hotel a few minutes later, Kurt singing the whole way. Blaine parked and turned to his smiling, singing boyfriend. He picked up Kurt's hand and kissed it, listening blissfully until he'd finished serenading him with 'Hopelessly Devoted'.

Blaine shook his head in disbelief, blown away again by his boyfriend's talent. "I can't believe how lucky I am. If I hadn't met you now, before you became a star, I would have been just another fanboy."

"You would be the only fanboy I'd want. Would it have been too sleazy if I picked you out of the audience and took you home with me?"

"I think I could have lived with that." Blaine kissed his palm with a smile. "But this is better. When you're a headliner and I'm in the front row, you'll already know I love you for yourself. The whole package. Not just your amazing voice and hot body. And I'll have an excuse to run off all the other fanboys with a baseball bat."

Kurt's eyes flicked away, the lighthearted mood dissipating. "I love you too, Blaine. Whether you become a musician, business man, lawyer, teacher. It doesn't matter. I wish I could be right there with you."

"You can. You will." They'd never spoken about the future, but Blaine had spent a lot of time thinking about it. Maybe he was too young to have everything mapped out in front of him. His parents would certainly think so, considering what he'd decided, but the idea of a future without Kurt was inconceivable. Blaine had been researching universities in New York long before they became a couple. There was certainly nothing keeping him in Ohio. His father might have other ideas, but he'd come around.

Kurt didn't reply.

_Maybe someday it won't hurt so much. People survive broken hearts. After a few years, maybe I won't be able to remember exactly what he looks like... Okay, no. Maybe I won't forget or move on. But I can make the most of the time we have together now. Then I'll have memories and dreams to live with in the future, so I won't be completely alone. _

They sat there looking at each other, each lost in his own thoughts, until Blaine pulled him close for a kiss. "Let's go inside."

The room was nice, nothing spectacular, but pleasant enough with two queen-size beds and a little sitting room with a loveseat and TV.

"I think I'll take a quick shower and slip into something more comfortable," Kurt said with a sultry half-smile that told Blaine he wasn't invited.

Blaine watched him take a leather satchel out of his suitcase and pick up his Burberry overnight bag. This was perfect. He'd been trying to come up with a way to get Kurt out of the room for a few minutes, and sending him out to search for the ice machine probably wouldn't have been sufficient. "I'll unpack. Would you like me to hang up your clothes for tomorrow?"

"Would you? That's so thoughtful, thank you." Kurt kissed him before going into the bathroom.

Blaine heard him singing 'Look at Me, I'm Sandra Dee' as he started putting away their clothes. He chuckled when Kurt's voice rang out as if affronted, "Keep your filthy paws off my silky drawers!"

When the sound of the shower reached him, Blaine busied himself arranging a romantic atmosphere, unpacking the flameless candles he'd bought the previous weekend while Kurt was with his family. He turned off most of the lamps, leaving one on in the sitting room, and moved the candles around until he was satisfied with the soft, flickering light.

The shower stopped as he was setting up his iPod dock. He pulled up the short playlist he'd created, setting it to repeat, and the quiet strains of 'Boom' from the 'Bed of Roses' soundtrack floated through the room. He'd chosen only the slowest, most romantic orchestral tracks, perfect background music. He was setting their suitcases out of the way when he heard Kurt open the bathroom door and flick off the light. He took a last quick glance around and turned to smile at Kurt, hoping he liked the little touches he'd added. All that was forgotten, though, when his boyfriend walked toward him.

A blush tinted Kurt's cheeks and his hands lifted to fiddle nervously with the sash belted around his satin robe as Blaine gaped at him. The robe was deep fuchsia, trimmed in black lace. It had loose, full-length sleeves, but the bottom of the robe only reached as far as his upper thighs.

"I – couldn't find anything pink in the men's departments, and I know how much you like pink, so I thought... But if you don't like it... Please say something."

"Oh, wow," Blaine got out on a rushed exhale. His eyes were traveling up legs that seemed to go on forever, then higher, over the slightly gaping front of the robe, which gave a hint of something else underneath, but he couldn't see what. "Fuck. Kurt." His ability to articulate was severely impaired, a sure sign of approval.

Kurt looked around the room, surprised by the candles and music, and glad he wasn't the only one who wanted to make this night special.

"When did you get that?" Blaine was staring at his legs again. "I love it," he assured in a low voice, in case there was any doubt.

"I bought it when I went home last weekend. I wanted to surprise you for Valentine's Day."

The mention of the holiday snapped Blaine out of his stupor and he dragged his gaze away to go retrieve a tiny, bright red gift bag from where he'd stashed it. He approached Kurt and kissed him, handing him the bag. "Happy Valentine's Day, Sweetheart."

"Blaine! You already gave me this wonderful romantic evening," he fretted.

"The evening has been perfect, and this," Blaine motioned to the bag, "is something I found when I was moping around last weekend trying to remember how I ever got through the day without you."

A beautiful, slightly sad smile curved Kurt's mouth at Blaine's remark. He peeked into the bag and was shocked to see a small jeweler's box. Setting the bag aside, he opened the box to reveal two identical pendants – small sterling silver medallions with intricately woven Celtic knots set in a yin/yang pattern.

Blaine was biting nervously at the inside of his cheek. "One for each of us, see? We just have to get chains for them, or charm bracelets, or tie clips or lapel pins. Whatever you like. I thought we could pick something out tomorrow." He knew jewelry was not the type of thing you were supposed to give someone in a new relationship, but he already felt like they'd been together forever.

Kurt stepped closer and put his arms around Blaine's neck, trying not to cry. "I love them, Blaine. This is the sweetest thing anyone has ever given me. Really. I love you so much."

Blaine breathed a sigh of relief, pulling him closer. He pressed his lips to Kurt's neck, exploring his fragrant skin and working his way up to Kurt's full lips before his hands began drifting from his back to his sides, slowly making their way toward the knotted sash in front that kept his robe closed.

"Ah-ah-ah," Kurt sing-songed, jumping back and wagging a finger. "Not until I've given you your gift."

Blaine's brows drew together as Kurt moved out of his arms. "But – I thought this –" he gestured at the robe. "You. In that. More than enough gift for me." He took a step toward Kurt, who stopped him with a hand flat on his chest.

"Nevertheless, I did get you something, so close your eyes."

Blaine dropped his arms and closed his eyes, imagining Kurt opening the robe and wrapping one of those long legs around his waist. He heard a zipper and the rustle of a plastic bag, then felt soft lips press against his and reached for Kurt again, his mind instantly reverting to the leg-around-waist scenario.

Kurt captured one of the wandering hands that was trying to reel him in. "Okay. Open them."

When Blaine opened his eyes, Kurt was standing directly in front of him holding a small black box wrapped in a red ribbon. He took the gift and looked at his boyfriend questioningly.

"Go on." Kurt's face betrayed hints of nervousness and excitement.

He untied the ribbon and removed the lid, setting them on a nearby table while looking into the box at a men's wrist cuff. It was dark brown leather, about two inches wide, with a multicolored braided cord going lengthwise down the center. The braid was done in blue, green and grey, and next to that on either side were small strips of twisted brown leather, all of them held in place by an additional leather cord threaded through the cuff and wrapped tightly around it every two inches.

Kurt wrung his hands as Blaine stared at the bracelet, until he couldn't take it anymore. "Do you like it?" he finally had to ask.

"It's perfect." Blaine traced a finger along the colorful band down the center and looked up at Kurt. "Like your eyes."

Kurt's face lit up and Blaine placed the bracelet on the table to wrap his arms around his boyfriend's satin and lace clad body again. His heart was thumping so hard in his chest the other boy could probably feel it. Kurt didn't stop him this time, when he went to untie the sash around his waist. Blaine slipped the robe from his shoulders and draped it over the table, stepping back to see what else his fantastic boyfriend had in store for him.

A deep groan rumbled through him when he saw Kurt's outfit. It was black silk, some kind of tunic, barely reaching the tops of his thighs and again belted with a sash. It had billowing sleeves with layers of ruffles around the wrists and down the front along a deep v-neck that reached almost to the belt. It had laces to keep it closed, but it was very loosely tied at the moment, showing lots of ivory skin behind the laces. Blaine reached out to Kurt's upper arms and slowly turned him in a complete circle. "Oh my God, it's a pirate shirt."

"Mm-hmm." Kurt posed with one hand on a jutting hip, the other playing with the ruffle over his chest. "I had this in my closet at home. Thought you might like it."

"I like it, I like it."

"And there's one last thing..."

"Holy crap, there's more? You're going to give me a heart attack."

"I hope not. I want you in prime condition." Kurt placed a hand on Blaine's shoulder and pushed him gently to his knees.

Blaine's hands slid over Kurt's hips as he sank to the floor, then rubbed along his bare thighs – because he couldn't not caress those legs – before moving back up and bunching the shirt against the sash around his waist. He sucked in a breath when he saw what else Kurt was wearing. Black, velvet panties imprinted with long-stemmed, red roses. Blaine simply stared, letting his mind soak in the sight of Kurt's creamy skin in the hi-cut panties that made his legs seem even longer. One flower in full bloom, with detailed thorns and leaves on a slightly curving stem, ran from the crotch to the high waistband. As he watched, Kurt's arousal grew, and Blaine leaned in to nose him into place under the stem, rubbing his face against the bulging fabric before sitting back for another look.

Kurt gazed down at the gorgeous man in front of him. He was certain this would be one of their last nights together and he wanted it to be perfect. All day he'd been trying to decide whether or not they should have sex and he'd finally decided against it. No matter how much he wanted to – and dear, sweet, evil dwarf did he want to – Kurt knew he wouldn't be able to live with himself if he took Blaine's virginity while planning to leave him. He couldn't do that to Blaine.

Blaine didn't know how long he'd been on his knees, staring, stunned by the knowledge that Kurt would do this. For him. While Blaine had congratulated himself for thinking of candles and music and atmosphere, Kurt must have asked himself what he could do for Blaine. And then he'd done it, regardless of what it must have cost him. The embarrassment must have been very real, but he'd still walked into a store, browsed women's lingerie and picked out a robe and panties. He'd probably been second guessing himself tonight too, wondering if Blaine would like it, hate it, laugh or just ask him what the hell he was thinking. He'd done it anyway because Kurt was as brave as he was beautiful.

Blaine wanted to do something for Kurt now. Something to show him he cared enough to put aside his own insecurities to make Kurt happy. Blaine looked up into those eyes, the ocean eyes that, if he was very lucky, would be the last thing he'd ever see, after a lifetime together. In Kurt's eyes he saw the reflection of his own heart, but behind that was the sadness that almost never completely disappeared anymore. Blaine wanted to make it go away. So. Fucking. Bad.

Blaine's hands left Kurt's hips, sliding up to his waist and drawing together at the front to untie his sash. He slowly rose to his feet while his hands slid lower again, then skimmed back up, over his thighs, lifting the tunic higher and higher, and over his head to be neatly folded and placed with the robe.

He took a minute to admire his boyfriend, standing in front of him wearing nothing but the panties that could barely contain him, then he took Kurt by the hands and led him over to sit on the end of one of the beds. Leaving him there, Blaine went to his iPod to select a different song. One that he'd started listening to at night sometimes when he was alone, fantasizing. After tonight, the song would belong to both of them. Maybe Kurt would listen to it and think about Blaine doing what he was about to do.

He changed the play mode so it would stop after one run through, then adjusted the volume, stalling a little. _Am I really doing this? _In Blaine's fantasies it was always him watching Kurt, not the other way around.

**Yes. Do it. Man up.**

_Right._ Breathe. _Man_ _up._ Breathe... _Here goes._ Blaine swallowed his pride and hit play, turning to face the bed.

Kurt's brows rose in surprise when the music started, a slightly upbeat, gritty bass guitar. He'd never heard this song. Blaine took a few steps toward him, his body moving to the beat as drums joined in with the guitar. He stopped just before the music changed to a keyboard that sounded like a whoosh of air. Kurt's eyes widened as Blaine's hips rotated once slowly in time with the sound, then his mouth fell open when the lyrics began.

_Sexy Boy, Sexy Boy  
>Sexy Boy, Sexy Boy<em>

Blaine's whole body swayed, hips circling slow, then fast, then slow to match the music. His eyes were downcast demurely as his hands came up to his chest and he slipped a couple of buttons free on his shirt, before he slowly raised his burning gaze to meet Kurt's stunned expression.

Blaine had no idea what the words to this song were, other than the chorus, but the fact that it was sung in French was part of the reason it had become his own private theme song for Kurt.

_Où sont tes héros aux corps d'athlètes  
>Où sont tes idoles mal rasées, bien habillées<em>

(Where are your heroes with bodies like athletes  
>Where are your rough shaven, well dressed idols)<p>

He continued unbuttoning his shirt, exposing his chest to Kurt's greedy eyes while his hips and torso rolled with the music.

_Sexy Boy, Sexy Boy_

He turned slowly as he lowered the shirt from his shoulders, his body facing away from Kurt and his head turned to the side. He slid the fabric down the muscled expanse of his back while his ass rotated hypnotically.

_Dans leurs yeux des dollars  
>Dans leurs sourires des diamants<br>Moi aussi un jour je serai beau comme un dieu_

(Dollars in their eyes  
>Diamonds in their smiles<br>One day I too will be beautiful like a god)

With the shirt still tucked into his pants, he pulled his arms out of the sleeves and dropped it, turning back toward the bed, swaying all the while. He moved closer, keeping his hot gaze on Kurt and stroking his hands over his abs and up his chest, then letting his eyes close, his head tilt back and lips part as if he were being caressed by his lover.

_Sexy Boy, Sexy Boy_

Blaine's eyes were glazed over when he looked at Kurt again and took another step closer. His hands slid down to his pants, unbuckling his belt as his tight abs rolled and his hips thrust. He pulled the belt away from himself, and Kurt, looking mesmerized, reached out to take it, sliding it out of his belt loops and tossing it aside carelessly. Blaine kept his smoldering gaze on Kurt as he unbuttoned and unzipped his pants, pulling them apart to expose his tented boxer-briefs.

_Apollon 2000 zéro défaut vingt et un an  
>C'est l'homme idéal charme au masculin<em>

(Apollo, perfect x 2000, 21 years old  
>The ideal man, masculine charm)<p>

Kurt watched his body swivel. His hips, shoulders, arms, legs and neck all moving, swaying, flowing like water – each part of him independent of the other – and Kurt hadn't known he could move like that and his eyes and throat were dry because he hadn't thought to blink or close his mouth. He just stared breathlessly at Blaine's incredible body – all hard muscles and olive skin and dark hair – and his hands, sliding up and down his chest and over his pelvis, pushing his pants down his legs as his hips thrust against an imagined lover, and stepping out of the pants, taking that last step toward Kurt.

_Sexy Boy, Sexy Boy  
>Oh Sexy Boy, Oh Sexy Boy<br>Sexy Boy, Sexy Boy  
>Sexy Boy, Sexy Boy<em>

Kurt didn't know when he'd brought his hands up to his face, to steeple over his mouth, or how long he'd been whimpering and begging Blaine to never stop and at the same time to please touch him and how badly he wanted to feel that body against his.

Then suddenly he was there, standing between Kurt's knees, and his body kept swaying and his back was arched so his pelvis gyrated against Kurt's stomach while his chest was a few inches away from Kurt's face. Blaine's hands were stroking roughly over his own nipples, fingers digging into his chiseled pecs, and Kurt didn't remember to breathe, wasn't sure there had ever been a time when he knew how to breathe.

Kurt's hands reached out suddenly to take over gripping Blaine's skin and stroking his hair-roughened chest, and Blaine's hands slid up over his own throat, his head lolling back for a moment, then the hands went farther to link behind his neck as his eyes bored into Kurt again, demanding more.

Kurt threw his arms around him and captured his mouth in a messy, needy kiss. He pulled their bodies together and his legs came up, wrapping around Blaine's thighs as he let himself fall backwards onto the bed, pulling Blaine with him, then instantly rolling them, flipping Blaine onto his back. Kurt forced his mouth away from Blaine's wet heat so his teeth could latch onto his neck, his hands back on Blaine's chest, palms flattening over his tight brown nipples and running in circles before his fingers found the little nubs and pulled at them, twisting and pinching until Blaine's head angled backwards, pressing into the mattress. And the noises Blaine made were deep and insistent, pleading and demanding, his hips still thrusting to the music that had ended without either of them noticing.

Kurt pulled his teeth from Blaine's neck only to suck hard on his skin, his hot mouth impatient to taste every inch of him, moving roughly over his neck, sucking and licking until he got to the hollow of his throat and Blaine bucked against him.

Kurt's hands stopped their delicious torture of Blaine's reddened nipples to clench onto his jutting hipbones and shove him down into the bed while he ground into him with deep, sharp strokes. And when that wasn't enough, he put his weight on Blaine's chest to raise his hips and pull at Blaine's boxer-briefs, tugging at them frantically to get the damn fabric out of the way, then his panties had to go too and each boy's underwear was tangled around his thighs and why the fuck were they wearing underwear anyway. But then they were pressed together, skin against skin, and their bodies were made for this because nothing on earth ever felt so good. Until they were thrusting again and the pleasure just kept building and never stopped. Their cocks were rubbing together, side by side between their bodies, and they would never be close enough, but it was still so fucking incredible. Then Kurt's mouth was on Blaine's neck again, his hands holding Blaine's hips down while he rutted hard against him and their chests were sliding back and forth with every thrust. Kurt could feel the hair on Blaine's chest as a constant abrasion on his soft skin and it made him want to scream or cry because it was too perfect.

Then Blaine was arching his back and pulling at Kurt's shoulders and his mouth was open in a silent scream as he came between them, warm liquid lubricating them so Kurt slid against him faster and easier, his hands bruising Blaine's hips and his teeth clenching onto his shoulder as his whole body went completely rigid and he shuddered helplessly, his hips trying to get closer to Blaine, but it was impossible so they just kept spasming and jerking uncontrollably for what felt like forever.

* * *

><p>Blaine's breathing was still labored, his pulse slowly returning to normal. Kurt's body was limp on top of him, a dead weight of warm flesh pressing down on him. It was heaven. He kissed Kurt's shoulder, his arms encircling the boy who rested on him so trustingly. He rolled them to their sides, holding Kurt close to support him, then he lowered Kurt onto his back, the stickiness between them slurping as their bodies peeled apart. He pulled his arm out from under Kurt's body, the other boy protesting tiredly, and bent to calm him with a kiss. Kurt breathed a sigh of contentment against his mouth and relaxed again.<p>

Kurt lay motionless, letting Blaine take care of him. He felt the panties, still tangled around his thighs, being removed and he opened his eyes just a crack to see Blaine smiling to himself and bringing the fabric to his lips for a kiss. Then Blaine walked out of his limited line of sight and Kurt couldn't keep his eyes open. He was exhausted. He couldn't remember the last time he'd had a good night's sleep. He'd just close his eyes for a few minutes.

Blaine cleaned himself up and returned to the bedroom with a cloth to wash Kurt. He hadn't moved, legs still dangling over the end of the bed, apparently asleep. Blaine washed him gently and turned back the blankets before picking Kurt up and tucking him into bed.

* * *

><p><strong>AN:** I feel all fluffy now. This chapter would have been up days ago, but it sucked rocks, so I had to rewrite it. And I'm glad I did!

I have to give a special shout out to agnesiest, whose OUTSTANDING poledancer fics prompted me to look up the sexy and incomparable Steven Retchless. I spent an hour watching his YT vids the other night – because damn – and that could be what planted the seed of Stripper!Blaine in my unsuspecting, yet filthy mind. That combined with the fact that 'Sexy Boy' by Air actually is my personal theme music for CC and I was listening to it at work when the idea slammed me upside the head. So, yay!

If you don't know the song, I recommend giving it a listen while reading the strip tease, to get a real visual of Blaine's hips rotating to the beat.

At least one more chapter and an epilogue to go. Meanwhile, "always remember, and please never forget" reviews are love.


	8. Connected

**Rating:** NC-17

* * *

><p>Blaine turned slowly, looking all around him. He was standing on a long, empty stretch of road. There were no cars, no buildings or trees. It looked like a desert. When he'd gone full circle he saw a shape up ahead. A dark outline against the setting sun. He squinted against the glare. The shape was tall and slender. A man. One shadowed arm moved; the man's hand smoothing his hair.<p>

Blaine walked toward him, using a hand to try to block the blinding sunlight. The outline of the man stood waiting and Blaine walked faster. He was still too far away to see a face, but he felt drawn inexorably toward the figure. The man's outline showed him turning to the side, still looking in Blaine's direction, then he faced the other way and began to walk.

Blaine surged forward, breaking into a run, desperate to catch up. The shadowy outline became more blurred as he moved away. Tears streamed down Blaine's face. He ran faster and faster, calling out as the figure disappeared into the glare on the horizon.

* * *

><p>He woke up suddenly, his eyes startled open. He was disoriented in the strange room, but the knowledge of where he was flooded back almost immediately. He was lying on his back in the hotel bed he shared with Kurt.<p>

Feeling a movement beside him, he turned to see Kurt staring at the ceiling, wiping a hand across his eyes. The darkness was broken by the red glow of the clock on the bedside table. Kurt turned slightly to look at him out of the corner of his eye. In the dim light, Blaine could just make out the shine of wetness on his face.

"Kurt?" he said hesitantly. With the nightmare still fresh in his mind he was almost afraid to try to touch him. Kurt's head turned back to the ceiling and Blaine could see the wet trail from tears that must have been sliding down his temple.

With a tightness in his chest, Blaine reached out to touch the wet skin. He moved onto his side and rolled Kurt toward him, pulling him into his arms. Blaine held him tenderly, stroking his hair as he quietly cried.

"It's okay, I'm here." Blaine rocked slightly, comforting him. "Did you have a nightmare too? Mine was awful." He shuddered. "I dreamt I lost you. You walked away from me and I couldn't stop you. I called out, but I couldn't make you come back." Kurt's sobbing intensified, choked sounds being torn from his throat and striking dread into Blaine's heart.

"Please tell me what's wrong." He continued stroking Kurt's back and hair, kissing his forehead. "You're scaring me."

"I don't want to go."

"What do you mean? Go where?"

"I don't want to leave you. I'm a selfish, horrible person."

Blood began to pound deafeningly in Blaine's ears. "It was just a bad dream." He clutched Kurt more tightly. "You're not leaving. It was a nightmare. You're not going anywhere." He stared into the darkness, placing kiss after tiny kiss against Kurt's hair.

Kurt's head shook in denial and his arms wrapped around Blaine's waist.

Blaine swallowed past the lump in his throat. "Sweetheart, tell me what's going on. What are you talking about? You can't leave. We belong together."

"No."

Everything blurred, Blaine's vision suddenly obstructed by tears. "Kurt," he whispered. "Please. Tell me what I did. Whatever it is, I'm sorry." He must still be asleep. This had to be another nightmare.

Kurt's head was shaking again. "You didn't do anything. It's my fault. I forced you into this. I took what I wanted without considering your feelings. I've been selfish. I'm so sorry."

"You're not selfish and you didn't force me into anything. Why are you talking like that?"

"You never wanted me. I took advantage of you, but I can't do it anymore. I'm going home."

"No. No. You can't. I won't let you. I'll follow you." Blaine was starting to panic.

"No. You'll meet someone who can make you happy. Someone who deserves you."

A wave of anger rushed through Blaine, brought on by shock and fear. Why was Kurt always doing things like this? Dragging him on these emotional roller-coaster rides? He sat up and turned on the lamp, dashing tears off his face impatiently. Kurt burrowed his face into the pillow while Blaine got up. He needed to be doing something, so he pulled on the boxers that had been discarded a few short hours ago and looked around for a box of tissues to bring to Kurt.

"I don't know why you're saying these things. I love you and I thought you loved me. Why are you talking about leaving, or about meeting someone else? You're not making sense. Please just tell me what's going on," he kept his voice even and reasonable while his mind screamed questions and demanded answers.

Kurt sat up, his back against the headboard, and wiped his face with a tissue. He was afraid he might have to tell Blaine everything. That hadn't been part of his plan. He wanted the breakup to be more amicable and mutual. He couldn't stand the thought of Blaine suffering or hating him, but he wasn't going to lie. "After our argument a couple of weeks ago I gave a lot of thought to what you said."

"I wouldn't call it an argument exactly," Blaine jumped in, too restless to wait for Kurt's answer. "I was an idiot and you were upset. I apologized and I thought you'd forgiven me. Now you're saying you haven't? You want to leave because I told you what other people were thinking? That's not fair, Kurt!" He didn't mean to yell or sound accusing. He just wanted Kurt to take it all back, or he wanted to wake up because this could Not. Be. Happening.

"I'm not angry and that isn't why I have to break up with you. But that was when I realized what I'd done."

"You don't have to break up with me. Stop saying that!" Blaine took a deep breath, trying to calm down. He didn't want this encroaching feeling of hysteria to induce him into saying something he didn't mean. "What you'd done – what are you talking about?"

"That was when I realized I really am a whore."

Blaine was stunned into silence.

"I used sex to trap you into this relationship. You never actually wanted me. I fooled myself into thinking you did."

Blaine couldn't believe what he was hearing. He began to pace, trying to make sense of this mess, but he couldn't. Because, no, it didn't make any sense. "Kurt, I want you to listen to me. I need for you to stop bashing yourself and really hear me." Blaine stood at the foot of the bed, piercing Kurt with his gaze. "We're going to talk about this rationally, not like last time."

Kurt nodded, his sad eyes dropping to the hands in his lap.

"First, you are not – and have never been – a whore."

Kurt began to shake his head in disagreement.

"Listen to me!" Blaine caught himself and stopped until he could speak quietly again. "People like that sleep around, not caring about their lovers, using sex for personal gain, or just to get off."

Kurt was quiet, listening with a small frown.

"You've never been with anyone but me, have you? Tell the truth now. You've already threatened to leave, there's no way to make things any worse."

"No. I've never been with anyone else."

"Do you think about sleeping with other guys?"

"Ugh – no." Kurt's lips curled in distaste.

Blaine closed his eyes with another deep inhale. This would work. Calmly, rationally break down his arguments one by one. "Why not?"

"I love you," he said simply.

"I love you too," Blaine immediately replied.

Kurt shook his head again. "No you don't. You might think you do, but it's only because of the sex. You love what we do together. It's not the same thing."

Blaine sat down, dumbfounded. "I can't believe you just said that. I can't believe you would even think that. Since the day we met I've wanted to be with you, spend time with you, know everything about you."

"That's why we should have stayed friends. I messed everything up by wanting more."

"No, Kurt. We couldn't have stayed just friends. I was falling in love with you. I didn't know it at first because that had never happened to me before, but I thought about you all the time. I've never felt this way about anyone else."

"It's a crush then. You'll get over it," Kurt said stubbornly.

"I won't get over it!" Blaine ran a hand through his hair in frustration, wanting to shake Kurt until his teeth rattled. "I've had crushes before and this is completely different."

"How?" Kurt's tone was skeptical.

Blaine counted silently to ten. He would not cry or yell. He had to control his runaway mouth and reason with him. Arguing would only make things worse and this was too damned important to mess up. "I guess, when I was infatuated with someone, I'd think about how it affected _me_, how dating him would make _me_ feel. Would I enjoy spending time with him. Would I be able to tell him whatever I had on my mind. Would I even want to? Basically, I'd wonder if he could make me happy."

"With you everything is the opposite," Blaine continued, trying to sort out his thoughts. "I wonder about your day, how you spend your time when we're apart. I wonder if you feel the same way I do. If I can make you happy or if I'm going to get on your nerves. If I'm good enough for you. What you're thinking and feeling and if you're comfortable telling me what's on your mind." _Obviously not... _"Which one reminds you of the way you think about me?"

"The second one."

Blaine nodded. "Because, when you love someone, that person is more important to you than yourself. Right? Tell me why you think you have to break up with me."

"Because –" Kurt couldn't quite remember the exact reason with all the conflicting thoughts swirling around in his head, but he still believed unfailingly that he could not let anything sway him. He knew he was biased. He _wanted_ to be swayed, therefore any argument in favor of keeping Blaine would sound convincing. He had to be strong. "Because you deserve better." Kurt distinctly remembered that being one of his primary motives. For some reason, Blaine smiled at that answer.

"You love me," Blaine stated.

Kurt's eyes narrowed. He had a feeling he was being manipulated. "Yes."

"You want me to be happy. To have the best of everything."

"Yes," Kurt couldn't disagree with that, but he was still eyeing Blaine's smile suspiciously.

"_You_ make me happy. _You_ are the best of everything," Blaine summed up his argument with smug precision, crossing his arms over his chest as if he'd just provided a jury with incontrovertible evidence. They would have no choice but to rule in his favor.

Kurt sighed and shook his head as he totally dismissed Blaine's reasoning. "No. I'm selfish and greedy and a coward and some other things I'd rather not admit. I'm also high-maintenance and sickly pale and I sound like a girl. You just need to remind yourself that you never liked me as more than a friend. You could do a lot better than me and we both know it. And I _am_ a whore because I used sex for personal gain, just like you said. I used it to get _you_."

Blaine's smile evaporated as Kurt spoke, every word cutting him like a knife. He'd never understood how deep Kurt's insecurities ran. How was it possible that someone like him could think so little of himself? Without taking time to consider whether or not this was a good idea, he got up and went to his suitcase, pulling out a familiar blue silk scarf.

Kurt's eyes widened, but he didn't say anything.

Blaine walked back to Kurt's side, looking down at him, no trace of a smile remaining. "Do you remember the safe word?"

Kurt nodded, shocked by the question. "Lib-"

Blaine cut him off with a hard kiss. "Don't say it unless you mean it. Do you trust me?"

"Yes," he whispered.

Blaine rolled up the scarf and tied it firmly around Kurt's head, blindfolding him and tugging it down slightly in front to make sure he couldn't see.

"Blaine?"

"Shh, it's okay. Just listen to my voice. No distractions and no arguments. Only my voice. I want you to think about everything I'm going to say and ask yourself if I've ever lied to you. Ask yourself if you've ever known me to deliberately lie to anyone."

Kurt shook his head, no. He trusted Blaine completely and couldn't really imagine him lying.

Blaine kissed him again, gently this time, then backed up to sit on the other bed a few feet away, watching Kurt as his head turned to follow the sound of Blaine's movements.

"Now. I'm going to tell you exactly what I think of you, and it will be easier if you can't see me." A worried look settled over Kurt.

"You are..." Kurt tensed up, as if Blaine were about to call him all the things he thought about himself. "You are not only the best person I know, you're also the most beautiful sight I've ever seen," Blaine said sincerely.

Kurt released the breath he'd been holding, rosy color stealing over his skin.

"You're kind and generous and courageous. I could spend all night telling you what makes you so amazing. I mean in general - not to me. It would be impossible to describe how _I_ see you, because you aren't a list of attributes. You're a feeling. An emotion. Trying to explain why I need you is like trying to explain why I need love, happiness, joy, family, friends, music... All those things make me the person I am."

Kurt looked ready to cry again. Blaine went to sit by his side and put one of his boyfriend's hands on the box of tissue, picking up the other to hold between his own. Kurt gave him a wobbly smile.

"I haven't really given this any thought before, so I'm not sure I'm making sense. I just want you to try to understand how I feel." Blaine rubbed a thumb across the back of Kurt's hand as he tried to put emotions into words. "You're more than all those things I just named, more than a means to make me happy and complete, which you do. You're also the person _I_ want to make happy and complete. I thought you knew that or I would have told you sooner." He looked at Kurt, who couldn't see him but was carefully taking in all his words. "We're connected somehow." Blaine put a hand on Kurt's chest and raised Kurt's hand to his chest. "Don't you feel it?"

"Yes."

"But you didn't think I felt it?" Blaine was saddened by the possibility.

"No," Kurt confirmed.

"Why?"

Kurt didn't know if he could describe the doubts and fears that clouded his mind almost every moment, or if he was ready to face them. "I don't know."

"Yes, you do," Blaine called him on the cop-out. "You think you're not good enough. I deserve someone better. Isn't that what you said?"

Kurt stayed silent, ashamed of his self-loathing.

"I'm going to take a stab here and say maybe people have been planting ideas in your head all your life. Telling you that you should be more like everyone else. That you're different."

Kurt dropped his chin to his chest.

"Well, you _are_ different. And you should definitely _not_ be like everyone else. You're unique and I love that about you. Your friends love that about you, and so does your family. We don't want to change you, Kurt. You're perfect." Blaine held up the hand that had been on Kurt's chest as if to ward off an argument, forgetting for a second that his boyfriend couldn't actually see him. "I know _you_ don't think you're perfect. If you did think so, that would be a huge imperfection." His joke was rewarded with a teary half-smile.

"I won't try to change how you see yourself, not all in one night at least," Blaine went on. "What I will do is try to make you understand how I see you. So. Repeat after me."

"Blaine loves me," Blaine said.

Kurt's lips pursed, holding back a true smile.

"Say it."

"Blaine loves me." Kurt repeated dutifully.

"He thinks I'm handsome and gorgeous and sexy."

Kurt blew out a harsh breath, embarrassed. "Blaine –"

"Say it."

"Fine. He thinks I'm – handsome and gorgeous and – sexy," he repeated in a disbelieving tone.

"He wants me so bad," Blaine teased.

"He wants me soooo bad."

Blaine's breath caught when Kurt teased him back, his eyes dropping to Kurt's mouth. "He fantasizes about kissing me and touching me and making love to me."

"He does?" Kurt was a little breathless.

"All the time."

"All the time."

"My body drives him crazy."

"But –"

"Kurt."

"My body drives him crazy." Kurt crossed his arms over his chest, the strength of his glare sadly wasted behind the blindfold.

"He wants to spend hours and hours licking me everywhere, sucking on my neck and squeezing my perfect ass."

Kurt's mouth gaped for a moment, then snapped shut.

"If you don't say it, I'll think you don't believe it and I need to prove it to you."

Heat flooded Kurt's cheeks. "I, um... I don't –" he felt Blaine stand up. "He – he wants to spend hours – um – licking me and – uh," his breath quickened as he tried to remember what Blaine had said. "Sucking on my neck," his hand crept up to touch his neck as he said this. "And squeezing my – my ass."

"Perfect. Your perfect ass."

"My perfect ass." Kurt leaned forward slightly, waiting to hear what else Blaine wanted to do to him."

"He wants to be with me forever."

Kurt inhaled sharply, refusing to continue the game, his lips drawing into a thin line. "Can I take this off now?" he sounded annoyed, plucking at the silk covering his eyes.

"No." The response was brusque, in a tone that left no room for argument. And it was very clear Kurt wanted to argue. Blaine watched him until the other boy quietly lowered his arm, clasping his hands in his lap. Kurt might not realize it yet, but Blaine had no intention of letting him win this argument, or allowing him to put them both through this hell again. Blaine's look became dark and feral.

Kurt couldn't see him, but he felt the change. Blaine was different. The sound of his breathing – something. Kurt shivered. The silence stretched between them until a sudden movement made Kurt jump. He felt two hands grab his head. He gasped and his hands flew apart, gripping the bedding on either side of his hips reflexively. He flashed back to Karofsky's huge hands grabbing him and let out a tiny whimper.

The hands instantly softened, thumbs brushing across his cheekbones until his racing heart slowed. He felt a breath on his face before soft, full lips pressed against his. A tongue lightly traced his bottom lip and he opened. His next whimper was needy, wanting.

The kiss deepened, full of promise and hope, and a possessiveness that created a bone deep craving in Kurt. He was weak and breathless when the lips left him, Blaine's face still close by, hands still holding him tenderly. Kurt wanted to reach for him.

"You're mine Kurt. And I'm yours. Never forget that."

Kurt's voice wouldn't cooperate when he tried to speak. He wasn't sure if he would have argued or agreed, but he inched slowly closer to the lips so near his own.

"No." Blaine's uncompromising voice stopped him cold and all he could do was obey. It didn't even occur to him to remove the blindfold without permission or to kiss Blaine anyway and make him forget his refusal.

Blaine watched a myriad of emotions flit across Kurt's face and he could imagine the questions he would have seen in his eyes, but he wouldn't give up. Kurt needed to learn that he only had as much power over Blaine as Blaine allowed, that he'd never forced him into anything. "Tonight you'll follow _my_ lead and there will be no question of me doing anything I don't want. I'm in charge. Understand?"

Kurt's mouth moved, but no sound came out. He swallowed and tried again. "Yes."

"Lie on your back on top of the blankets," Blaine commanded as he went to retrieve the black and pink sashes from Kurt's shirt and robe. He quickly tied one to a leg of the bed while Kurt blindly straightened the covers and lay on top of them. "Get in the middle of the bed." He was tying the second belt as Kurt scooted around, trying to center himself on the mattress. "Good. Now spread your arms straight out to the sides." Kurt's mouth opened as if he were going to say something and Blaine silently dared him, but he must have changed his mind because he stayed quiet.


	9. Free

**Rating:** NC-17

* * *

><p>Kurt gasped as the first belt was looped around his wrist. He kept still, though, breathing heavily, heat infusing his body as Blaine secured him to the bed. Kurt recognized his need to have Blaine touch him without being asked or even encouraged. He hadn't thought it would happen. Kurt was always the one to start things between them. Anything Blaine did now, though, would be solely because he wanted to. He wished Blaine would gag him, but knew he wouldn't. Kurt had to be able to say the word if he wanted this to stop. But he didn't want it to stop. He just hoped he'd be able to keep from begging.<p>

Blaine stood back to survey his work. Kurt was stretched out on the bed, hard and trembling, his teeth digging into his lip so hard Blaine feared he would draw blood. He wanted Kurt to feel powerless, even if they both knew he wasn't. He crossed his fingers, hoping his next move didn't backfire.

[Begin Kurt Only POV]

Kurt could hear Blaine moving around the room, probably getting the lube, maybe a towel. He shivered at the thought of what his lover might do to him, his body curving in an arc as pure need rushed through him in waves. Underneath the blindfold his eyes were screwed shut and he could hear whines beginning to spill from his throat, like a puppy calling for attention. _Stop that!_

The sound of a camera shutter went off like a gunshot in the room. Kurt was paralyzed with shock. He heard it again and began to struggle, frantically pulling against the bonds that trapped him, exposed and vulnerable on the bed. The blood pounded through his veins, spots of color appearing all over his chest, neck and face, and turning his engorged cock an angry red.

The shutter clicked again and again before he heard something, Blaine's phone maybe, being set down on the nightstand. He listened intently, his body as taut as a bowstring.

The next thing he heard sounded like the ripping of plastic. He panted heavily, waiting and trying desperately to understand every tiny sound to reach his ears. A strange rustling noise, then a bottle cap clicking open. The faint scent of strawberries. He whimpered, forgetting to struggle. The bottle was closed and tossed onto the bed. Then the unmistakable sound of a hand sliding wetly, spreading the sweet-smelling lubricant. Kurt's mouth watered as he visualized Blaine's fingers stroking himself, his beautiful cock, long and hard, ready for Kurt to take all of it down his throat.

The bed dipped, tearing Kurt out of his fantasy. He instinctively pulled against the bindings, trying to reach for Blaine. The more he pulled, the tighter his bonds became. He could feel Blaine moving on the bed, then his legs were being pushed apart and Kurt spread them wide without thinking.

Hands and lips and tongue touched him everywhere in a slow, random exploration of his body. Little tremors were going off inside him and he hoped Blaine couldn't feel that because he didn't want to be so transparent, but at least he wasn't pleading for more. He hadn't said a word and he was determined not to. It would ruin everything. But, oh, the wet heat of Blaine's mouth on him was almost unbearably erotic – sensuous and intoxicating.

When Kurt was trembling helplessly, the straps around his wrists were adjusted enough to be comfortable again and the pillow under his head was tugged away. There was a hand on his ankle, fingers splaying against his skin and a thumb making small swirling patterns. He could imagine Blaine, sitting on his knees right next to him, absentmindedly petting as his gaze traveled slowly over his body. Kurt thought he could feel warmth on his skin everywhere Blaine looked.

The mattress shifted again as Blaine moved between his legs. Kurt felt the hand grasp his ankle and lift his leg, guiding it up to rest his calf on a strong shoulder. His other ankle was tapped and he lifted it too, letting his leg feel its way slowly up an arm to rest on the other shoulder. If he turned his feet inward he could feel Blaine's hair tickling his toes.

_Don't touch him. He didn't say you could do that._

"Up," Blaine instructed.

The sound of his voice startled Kurt, sending chills rippling through him after the lengthy silence. He used the leverage of his legs on Blaine's shoulders to raise his hips and felt a pillow sliding under him. Kurt felt as though everything was happening in slow motion. Every move his lover made was enhanced by his blindness and bondage. He lowered himself onto the pillow, picturing his hips thrust obscenely into the air.

_I've never imagined anything like this. I don't know how I'm supposed to react. If I don't ask him to stop, is that the same as asking for more? No. He's in charge, he said. He can do anything, or nothing to me._

Now there was a hand on each ankle and they were sliding along his legs, caressing everywhere. Kurt was feeling more and more pliant with each stroke of those hands. He was lying passive and open, stretched out and helpless. He was warm and lax and just loving being touched like never before.

_This is so strange. Surreal. Mmmm, please don't stop._

"I love touching you, looking at you like this." Blaine's disembodied voice penetrated his thoughts. "You're incredible. I want to memorize every inch of your skin, and the way you move, the way you respond. I want to learn exactly how you like to be touched. I want to know your body better than you do." Kurt listened to his soft words and felt himself blushing. "I love it when your chest turns pink like that. Am I embarrassing you? I have to tell you what I'm thinking though, because apparently you don't know what you mean to me or how much I want you. Only you." Kurt's skin became even warmer, turning crimson.

"Does it feel like you're forcing me now?" The voice asked quietly. Hands became firmer on his legs, stroking his calves to the backs of his knees and down toward the pillow.

_It feels different than the other times._

"Do you really think I've done anything I didn't want to? Hmm?" He felt Blaine lean toward him, splayed fingers gliding over the tops of his thighs to rub along his hipbones, thumbs tantalizingly close to his groin.

_No, that isn't what I meant. Please - I can't -_

"You think I've never had the opportunity to be with anyone else?" Kurt sucked in a sharp breath as a thumb swiped over the head of his cock, smearing pre-come around the smooth skin. Fingers curled around him, stroking down to squeeze in gentle pulses around the base.

_Oh yes please. I mean no. I don't know._

"I'm just a naive, helpless victim. Is that right?" Squeeze – release. "I don't really want to be with you?" Stroke up the shaft – over the head – back down.

_No - ahh - not helpless. I don't know. You're confusing me._

"It's just the sex. Not you, in particular." The warm hand was moving faster on his cock. "I'd feel the same with anyone if they were lying naked in front of me." Other fingers rubbed against his perineum. "Isn't that right?"

_Please don't say that._

Kurt heard the snapping open of the bottle again, then the shock of cold drops hit him, making him gasp against his will. Cold liquid landed on the hot skin of his shaft as the hand stroked him, moved around him, picking up lube as it went, and more cold drops until he was a little too slick and there wasn't enough friction. The hand kept moving, sliding over his skin too easily, but he was soon warm again.

Then there were two hands on him, twisting around him in opposite directions, and the blessed friction was back. Then one hand concentrated on swirling around and swiping across the head of his cock while the other gripped his length and stroked. Kurt knew he was gasping and shivering. He couldn't control it. It felt too good and he was going to come, but he wouldn't let himself scream out loud. He wouldn't. All his muscles were tense and twitching from the effort of not thrusting and then he was coming over the fingers on him and onto his chest and stomach, and the hands were slowing, finishing him off until he went slack.

He felt boneless and heavy and weak, but he thought he would be content to stay right there, tied to that bed, with Blaine touching him, for the rest of his life. Then Blaine was bending over him and Kurt's feet slid down his back until his knees were crooked over his shoulders and he felt a tongue lapping at a drop of cum on his stomach. A hand moved down to fondle his balls and he whined tiredly, but he was more helpless than ever and he loved it.

Blaine pulled away, sitting up again, guiding Kurt's legs and placing them feet down on the bed, spread wide with his knees bent. He barely had the energy to keep them there, but he would do absolutely anything Blaine wanted.

Fingers still slick with lubricant flitted over his opening with barely-there touches. Kurt was so sated that every light touch felt exquisite instead of teasing. The other hand was stroking his leg again, from the tops of his toes to his inner thigh and sometimes lower to slide between his ass and the pillow and squeeze before starting over again. Then the fingers at his entrance became bold and insistent, and a whole hand swiped against him, fingers and palm smearing him with their excess lube.

The hand turned until Blaine's middle finger was sliding back and forth along his cleft and across his entrance until it slowly pushed its way in. Kurt tensed slightly against the intrusion, but soon let himself go limp again and the finger moved, sliding in and out of him in a smooth, gentle rhythm. He'd never felt so relaxed and open before when Blaine had done this and it didn't take long to ready him for another finger.

He felt the familiar sting when the second digit pushed inside, but the pain didn't last and it became a delicious feeling of being stretched. The fingers turned around inside him and continued stroking slowly, so slowly he grew impatient, but it was up to Blaine to set the pace. The fingers spread apart, scissoring, stretching him more. It was so good that Kurt was starting to feel decidedly less tired. His body was coming alive again, his muscles quivering.

Blaine refused to take the hints Kurt's body was giving and kept up the slow fingering until it went from relaxing to wonderful to frustrating because he wanted so much more. His breathing became ragged and his chest was flushed again before a third finger was finally added. Kurt's mouth fell open on a heavy sigh and he wanted so desperately to thrust onto that hand but he wouldn't do it. The slow stretching and pleasuring went on and on until Kurt nearly broke his self-imposed no talking rule.

"You never answered me, Kurt." He jumped when Blaine's voice cut through the silence again. "Well? Are you forcing me now?" The bottle reopened, focusing Kurt's scattered thoughts. "Is this all part of your master plan to trap me into a relationship?" With a fresh coat of lube, a fourth finger was inserted and Kurt almost cried out in surprise and pain.

He felt Blaine bend over him, their chests lightly touching, but Blaine's hips were still raised. He must be on his knees, kneeling over him. The pain gradually faded as the hand stroked into him, fast enough to keep him rock hard, too slow to make him come. Blaine's breath was on his neck and cheek, teasing him with lips so close to his skin he could almost feel them. "If you're uncomfortable with this, I could stop."

_No! Don't stop. I need you. Please don't make me beg._

"You're worried I'm only in this for sex, or because of sex, or something like that, so I think you're right. It would be best if we don't do things like this from now on. No more touching or tasting."

_That's not fair. You're twisting my words._

"No more sleeping together, curled around each other every weekend." The voice continued tormenting him and Kurt felt tears burning his eyes behind the blindfold. "Maybe after a year or two of hand holding and dry, chaste kisses you'll have a little faith in me. What do you think?" He began to cry softly, trying to hide it, but Blaine was so close Kurt knew he must hear and feel every stuttering breath he took.

"It's up to you." Blaine's body was moving slightly, his chest rubbing in tiny motions against Kurt's. "I'll stop right now. Sleep in the other bed. Take you back to school tomorrow and say goodbye at your door. Maybe you'd let me give you a little peck on the cheek." Blaine's lips grazed lightly against his face. "In a few days I might ask you out to dinner, and maybe you'd say yes. Maybe not. You might have a date with someone else by then."

_Never. I never want anyone else._

"We'd still be friends and you could tell me all about your date the next day. If that's what you want, you just have to say the word." The fingers started pulling out of him.

_No, no, no, please don't leave me. _

"One word. You know what it is. And I'll leave you alone." Kurt felt him rubbing against his entrance again, wanting back in, but it was different this time. So much more than fingers brushing against him. The tears dried and he felt dizzy, lightheaded, his stomach clenching in anticipation.

_OhhhhhGodYes. Please. PleasePleasePlease._

"Come on, Kurt. What are you waiting for? If you're going to break up with me, just do it. Say the word." Blaine's face was directly above him, whispering to him, waiting for him to decide. "Say it... Lib-" Kurt cut him off, crashing their mouths together, though he barely had to move. Then Blaine was kissing him and touching him and pushing slowly inside, and Kurt kissed him back like his life depended on it.

He was open and so ready the pleasure outweighed the pain from the start, but he'd never been so stretched before and the burn was powerful as Blaine's cock eased into him. Kurt kissed him desperately, showing the love and need he couldn't voice, and he moved his hips to get Blaine deeper inside because he'd never wanted anything more. But Blaine was stubbornly considerate and put a hand on Kurt's hip to hold him down while he pushed in at a snail's pace to minimize the pain.

Blaine's tongue tangled with his in long, warm, sweet kisses while they inched closer and closer together. When he couldn't go any deeper, their mouths separated and Blaine's forehead rested against his neck as they both took deep, harsh breaths and waited for Kurt's body to adjust.

This wasn't the way Kurt had imagined his first time would be. But, to be fair, he hadn't been imagining it for very long. Without love there'd been no interest in sex. With love there'd been interest in little else. The cravings of his heart and loins had been slammed into overdrive by one Blaine Anderson. Cravings that were being satisfied even now as he experienced a fullness that surpassed his dreams.

Blaine made love to him so slowly, kissing and touching and whispering to him. Kurt hoped it would never end, but at the same time...

_Blaine. I want – need – need more. _

_Please just - Blaine. _

_I can't... Ahh!_

"Liberace!"

[End Kurt Only POV]

* * *

><p>Blaine went stock-still, his eyes round. "Kurt? I'm sorry. I didn't – I mean, I thought..." His muscles became responsive to his neural commands once more and he began to pull out of the heaven that was Kurt's body. Long legs quickly wrapped around his waist and heels dug into his ass, pushing him back in. He struggled against it, starting to panic.<p>

"Blaine! Stop!" Kurt was panting and groaning under him.

_Oh my God I'm hurting him!_ Blaine tried pulling out again with renewed vigor.

"Fuck! Blaine! Don't move!"

Blaine went still again. "Kurt? Are you okay? Did I hurt you? Oh God, I'm so sorry! I'm sorry," he was whispering by the end of this tirade.

"Blaine, for the love of – will you please just listen?"

Blaine nodded, then winced because nodding made his body move a little and Kurt groaned again.

"Untie me, please."

_Shit! I can't believe I tied him to the bed! What the hell is the matter with me?_ Blaine stretched an arm out to free one of Kurt's wrists, then the other.

"Ow! Oh – ah – Gaga that hurts." Pinpricks of sensation stabbed viciously at Kurt when he bent his elbows, and his muscles ached so much he wasn't able to lift his arms, not without a lot of pain. He dragged his arms lower on the bed, gritting his teeth, until he felt Blaine trying to pull out of him again and automatically made to grab him. "Ah! Ouch. Don't move."

Blaine stopped moving.

"Not you. Me. My arms are asleep, but please don't get off me. I just wanted to touch you. I didn't know I'd be so sore. Give me a minute okay?"

"Okay," Blaine said in a small voice.

"Blaine, Honey, could you please take the blindfold off me now? I really want to look at you." The scarf was ripped off.

Kurt squinted, pained by the light. Blaine lay on top of him, perfectly still and, unfortunately, softening inside him. Kurt moved his hips and clenched his ass tight. He heard Blaine's breath catch, felt a twitch of the cock filling him.

"Kurt?" Blaine said hesitantly.

Kurt opened his eyes enough to peek at the gorgeous boy over him, who was supporting his weight on his arms so he wouldn't crush him. A huge smile wreathed Kurt's face. After a moment of uncertainty followed by a deep sigh of relief, there was an answering smile and Blaine lowered himself to press their lips together softly.

Sighing into the kiss, Kurt tried to raise his arms again. The numbness was almost gone and the tingling was becoming bearable. The aching would take a little longer, but he could ignore it. His arms circled Blaine, one hand on his back to hold him close while the other slid into the soft hair at the nape of his neck. "You're inside me," he whispered against Blaine's mouth, who responded by rolling his hips.

"Come here," Blaine said, getting to his knees. He put his arms around Kurt's back and pulled him up so he was sitting on Blaine's thighs, legs still wrapped around his waist. Kurt happily sank down onto him, but Blaine was still moving. He held Kurt securely and edged toward the side of the bed, shuffling along on his knees. Kurt clung to him tightly as he lowered a leg to the floor and stood up, then carried him to the loveseat. Blaine turned and patted his boyfriend's buttocks as he carefully sat down.

Kurt took the hint and unwound his legs, adjusting himself so he straddled Blaine as he lowered them to the loveseat. He looked questioningly at Blaine, not sure what he had in mind.

Blaine got comfortable on the couch and stuffed a cushion behind his back. This was one of the positions he'd fantasized about most since their first night together. He looked up at Kurt, who seemed to be waiting. Blaine pulled the gorgeous boy down for a kiss. "I want you to ride me," he said in a low voice, stroking a hand down Kurt's chest.

"Oh," Kurt breathed, loving that idea. He moved experimentally and Blaine groaned. Kurt didn't need any further encouragement. With his hands on Blaine's broad shoulders he planted his knees more firmly on the couch next to Blaine's hips and raised himself slowly. He concentrated on the hardness filling him, rising up until he felt only the tip of Blaine's cock inside him before reversing direction and sliding down onto him. "Ohhh, wow," he murmured, squirming a bit to see how far down he could go.

It was a slow pace to start, Kurt learning how high – and low – he could move. As his breathing sped up, so did his movements. Soon he was dropping hard onto Blaine's lap and his eyes were closed, the better to feel the thick shaft filling him.

When Kurt had a good rhythm going, Blaine put his hands on his boyfriend's waist and adjusted his own hips. He gradually changed his angle as Kurt rode him with his head thrown back slightly. Blaine watched him closely and tilted his hips before the next down thrust. The effect was stunning. Kurt's eyes popped open and he emitted a shriek of pleasure, turning his lust-blown gaze on Blaine.

"Blaine!" he cried, his body moving faster. "Ohh... OhMyGod!" With every thrust Blaine hit a spot inside him that caused him to release a torrent of words, a flood of babbling moans and cries and plea's as he slammed down harder.

Blaine's hands slid to Kurt's hips to steady him as the thrusts became erratic. Blaine tensed, trying to hold back his orgasm until Kurt reached his. The hands on his shoulders were suddenly clenched in his hair. His head was yanked back against the loveseat, Kurt furiously gripping fists full of curls and leaning into him while riding him frantically.

All too soon, Blaine knew his boyfriend was right there at the edge. He recognized the changes in Kurt's voice when he was about to come. Blaine grabbed him by the neck and pulled him down, capturing his mouth and his high, keening cry. He kept their lips sealed tight as he came hard into Kurt's shuddering body.

It was several minutes before Kurt could speak again. He was bent over awkwardly, his face plastered to Blaine's upper chest where he'd collapsed when his limbs turned to jelly. "Blaine. That was... It was..."

"I know. It was." Blaine agreed.

Kurt struggled to sit up a little so he could drop his forehead against Blaine's and look into his glazed eyes. "I didn't know it could be like that."

Blaine was sprawled out, head still on the back of the loveseat and hands still on Kurt. "Neither did I. But I hoped."

"I think I might have pulled your hair."

Blaine chuckled, causing Kurt to bounce a little. "You did. Just like in my fantasies."

"Really?" he said with surprise.

"Truly." Blaine kissed him softly, then lifted his boyfriend just enough to slide out of him so he could get rid of the condom. He tied it off and tossed it toward the trash can. "Are you ready to talk now?" he asked, watching as Kurt's expression became shuttered. Blaine didn't want to spoil the mood, but he didn't think there'd ever be a better time to make his boyfriend see things his way - except maybe a couple of minutes ago.

"Do we have to?" Kurt pouted.

"I'm afraid so. There are a couple of things I really need to tell you."

"Okay." Kurt sighed, eyes downcast.

"First..." Blaine paused until blue eyes met his. "I am completely in love with you."

His smile was only a little sad as Kurt answered. "I'm in love with you too."

"I know. That brings me to my second point, which is that breaking up is not an option."

"But -"

"No. Just, no. Until the day you can convince me you don't love me anymore, I'm not giving you up. I might be an idiot, but I'm not stupid."

Kurt played with Blaine's chest hair absentmindedly. "You don't understand."

"That is an understatement. I have no idea where this is coming from. But I will, as soon as you explain it to me."

He continued to look in the vicinity of Blaine's chest as he took a deep, fortifying breath. "You don't really want me."

Blaine sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose. "Pretty sure I just proved otherwise, Babe."

A bigger smile curved Kurt's lips, but then he shook his head. "Until tonight it's always been me who had to take the lead. You'd never touch me until I made the first move. You'd respond after I did something to turn you on, but you were never interested just from being around me."

Surprise showed clearly on his face as Blaine listened. "I always want you, Kurt. I just didn't want you to feel pressured to do anything."

"I felt pressured to do everything. I always had to be the one to put myself out there."

Blaine was slowly coming to the realization that his way might not be the only way to look at a situation. If he'd been in Kurt's place he might have felt just as unsure of himself. "I'm sorry. I never thought... From now on I'll make sure you know exactly how I feel about you."

Kurt only looked more pained. "That's only part of the problem. Not even the biggest part."

Nervousness itched along Blaine's skin. "Okay," he swallowed. "Tell me everything."

"I'm ashamed to."

"I'm the one who's ashamed after what you just told me. Apparently I'm a miserable failure as a boyfriend."

"You're a perfect boyfriend. Almost."

"We can argue that later. Tell me what the other problem is," Blaine shook his head, getting back on topic.

Kurt was still avoiding eye contact, so Blaine tugged his boyfriend's head down to rest on his shoulder. "It's okay. Whatever it is can't be that bad. We'll work it out."

"It is bad. I'm a horrible person," Kurt muttered petulantly against Blaine's skin.

"You're definitely not a horrible person, Kurt. Come on. 'Fess up. I did a strip tease. You owe me," Blaine joked.

Kurt chuckled. "You were hot."

"Thank you. I thought it went okay for a first attempt. It had the desired result of making you crazy."

"Did I try to pull your hair out then too?"

"No, but I think you left some bite marks on me." Blaine could see the back of Kurt's neck turn red. "Come on, Sweetheart. Tell me what's bothering you."

"I -" Kurt burrowed deeper against Blaine's shoulder. "I, um... I -" the rest was mumbled unintelligibly.

"Sorry? I didn't quite catch that."

Kurt heaved a resigned sigh. "I assaulted you."

Confused, Blaine took a minute to try to make sense of that, with no success. "I don't understand."

"That first night. The first time I kissed you -"

"I kissed _you_," Blaine contradicted. This seemed to be an important distinction considering what Kurt had revealed so far.

"I was pulling you toward me," countered Kurt.

"I had you pinned against a wall," Blaine retorted.

"Only because I was running away. I didn't want you to know what I'd done."

Blaine processed that bit of news. He'd been so distracted after the kiss he'd forgotten to ask why Kurt was running. "Still confused. What did you do?"

"I assaulted you!"

"How, exactly? I think I'd remember that."

"You were asleep," Kurt thumped him with a fist.

A memory came back to Blaine. He'd been dreaming about Kurt, then he woke up and Kurt was right next to him before his mad dash for the door. "Okaaay. I remember falling asleep, sort of, or waking up anyway. You were giving me a backrub and I must have dozed off."

Kurt nodded against his neck and held him tighter, humiliated. "Yes. You fell asleep and I... I was touching you. I'm a monster," he whispered tearfully.

The hair on Blaine's arms stood on end as his skin tingled. "You – ah... You were touching me?" He started stroking Kurt's back unconsciously and felt him nod again. "How – where – how did you touch me? You mean you were... Did you... You know." Blaine cleared his throat. "Were you jerking me off in my sleep?" _Wow, that's hot._

"No!"

"Oh." Blaine couldn't hide his disappointment. "How then?"

"I was rubbing your back and you rolled over and I started touching your arm."

"My arm." Blaine cocked a brow, looking into the blackness of the TV screen across the room for guidance.

"You have very nice arms. But then you were on your back and I -"

Blaine held his breath.

"I sort of -" Kurt's voice squeaked to a halt. "I touched your chest."

"Okay. And?"

"And your nipples." Kurt's hands abandoned the comfort of Blaine's torso to slap over his own face.

Blaine's gaze flickered around the room as he waited for the rest of Kurt's big revelation. When nothing else was forthcoming, he had to prompt him again. "You touched my nipples." He felt another furious little nod and scratched his head, wondering if he was missing something. "Is that all?"

Kurt sat up on his lap and stared at him indignantly. "What do you mean is that all? We were only friends and I was attacking your body!"

Blaine couldn't completely hide his smile as he tried not to laugh in Kurt's face. "Um. Okay. I... forgive you."

Kurt crossed his arms over his chest and glared at Blaine. "You still don't get it!"

He could barely speak past the laughter rumbling around in his chest, so he shook his head.

"I assaulted you," Kurt explained slowly, his head wobbling side-to-side in his best 'Duh' face. "I victimized you and now you think you're in love with me. Like Stockholm Syndrome or something."

Unable to contain it anymore, Blaine laughed long and hard while Kurt continued to glare daggers at him, which only served to make him laugh harder. A few minutes later, his stomach aching, he wiped the tears from his eyes and tried to speak. "Oh, wow, Kurt. I'm sorry, but that was just too funny."

Kurt slapped him on the side of the head. "I see nothing funny about this."

"Ouch. _That_ might have been assault." Blaine pulled him into his arms again, stray chuckles still popping up randomly. "I swear to you I do not have Stockholm Syndrome," he choked back another burst of hilarity. "And I have not been victimized."

"That's exactly what a victim of Stockholm would say."

More peals of laughter, quickly controlled. "I promise it's the truth. Isn't Stockholm when someone starts to care for their captor? Touching my chest in my sleep hardly qualifies you as a captor. Sorry to disappoint."

"I know you don't have Stockholm, don't be ridiculous. That was just an example. I'm not a therapist – though you should probably see one – but I did things to you in your sleep and when you woke up you kissed me."

"Of course I kissed you. I find you incredibly attractive. You're fucking hot, Kurt."

Kurt could be quite stubborn and was kind of used to winning arguments and getting his own way. But he was not spoiled. He was merely correct most of the time. "You'd never shown the slightest interest in me before. The timing is more than coincidental."

"Falling for a friend was a new experience for me. It took a little while for me to figure it out. Waking up to find you next to me triggered all kinds of revelations." Probably best not to tell Kurt about his dream, Blaine thought. He'd want to take blame (credit) for that too.

"But –"

"Forget it, Hummel. There's no way in hell you're getting rid of me, so deal with it. If necessary, I'll keep you tied to a bed until _you_ have Stockholm and swear to love me forever."

"Forever is an awfully long time, Blaine," Kurt said with a little grin, his forehead resting in the crook of Blaine's neck.

"One can only hope."

"...How would you feel about friends-with-benefits?"

Blaine gasped loudly. "Why, Kurt Hummel! I'll have you know I'm not that kind of guy."

Kurt smiled. "You couldn't actually stop me from leaving, you know," he teased. "And once I was back home, I'd be out of reach." He snuggled closer. "My father would get a restraining order if you tried to stalk me."

"I'd be destined for prison then. Would you come see me there? I think the minimum security places allow conjugal visits."

"I don't know," Kurt pretended to consider. "Prisons are so dirty."

"I'd make it worth your while, and pay your dry cleaning bills." Blaine's hands strayed down to the firm globes of Kurt's ass.

"Well, in that case I might think about it." Kurt's fingers were twirling in his boyfriend's chest hair again. _Boyfriend!_ A world of possibilities was opening up before him once more. "So... you think I'm hot, huh?"

Blaine growled at him until he giggled and flopped him onto his back to lean over and kiss him, long and deep and possessive. "I'll show you how hot you are." He stood up and pulled Kurt along behind him toward the bed, with a short stop in the bathroom to wash dried cum off their bodies. Then Blaine gestured for him to sit.

Kurt bounced happily up and down on the mattress while Blaine went to pick up his phone from the nightstand. Kurt froze. Blaine sat next to him and opened the photo gallery, pulled up the first snapshot and handed the phone to his boyfriend.

Kurt stared, wide-eyed, at a close-up of his face. The blindfold was obvious of course, but you couldn't tell he was tied down. What was striking about the photo was the look on his face. His neck was arched and straining, his skin flushed and his lips open as if he were in the throes of ecstasy – and Blaine hadn't even touched him yet. "I, um. I look kind of..."

"Hot. Hot is the word you're searching for, although I would also accept stunning, breathtaking or sexy as all hell."

Kurt's face turned a self-conscious shade of pink and he smiled bashfully. "I've never seen myself look like that." He scrolled through the other pictures, blushing more furiously at each one.

"You can delete them. I don't want you to be embarrassed, but I wouldn't mind keeping the first one if it's okay. I wouldn't let anyone else see it. I'd take it off my phone and keep it locked on my computer."

Kurt deleted all but the first photo and handed the phone back.

Blaine kissed him. "Thank you. It means a lot that you trust me with this."

Kurt nodded, still embarrassed but also really flattered.

"You knooow," Blaine glanced at him sidelong. "This picture reminds me of the way you looked in the choir room that day." He grimaced, remembering too late the argument that followed.

"Really? No wonder you tried to talk to me about it. I'm sorry if I embarrassed you," Kurt apologized, having new insight into the whole conversation.

"You didn't embarrass me. I love seeing you like this. I just get a little jealous. I don't want you to try to hide how sexy you are, but I'm the only one who gets to see your orgasm face." Blaine bumped their shoulders. "I'm too stingy to share."

Kurt was uncomfortable with this topic, but as long as they were on it. "That night – I thought you were trying to tell me that people were laughing at me behind my back."

"No! Sorry. Wow. We've really got to work on our communication. No one is laughing at you. Some of them are a little envious because, let's face it, they're lucky to have a date, let alone a relationship, and we were in their shoes not long ago. A few of them want to steal you away from me – fat chance. And the Warblers just want you to teach them how to dance. They're all good guys and they're happy for us, but Thad threatened to slash my tires if you don't bring back the sexy."


	10. Epilogue

"Alright, boys. Blazers off!"

The Warblers glanced around at each other, unsure what to make of this groundbreaking direction.

Kurt stood in front of the group, arms crossed, already in his shirt sleeves. Behind him was a laptop, projector and screen, another first for Warbler practice. Kurt's eyes jumped over to Blaine, who smiled at him encouragingly, then jutted his chin toward the projector and quirked a brow in question. Kurt answered with a devious grin. _You'll see._

After giving the other boys what Kurt deemed a reasonable amount of time to absorb the shocking prospect of going blazerless right there in front of everybody - _GASP!_ - he provided some background info to soothe their poor, nervous little hearts. _It's sad, really, how self-conscious some boys are._

"It has been brought to my attention that some of you feel the Warblers' traditional dance routines could use a little more, shall we say, spice. So, with the full backing of the council, I've taken it upon myself to assist all of you in loosening up." As he said this, Kurt uncrossed his arms and shook them out at his sides, releasing tension.

"So, before we start, everyone please remove your blazers and spread out a bit. You'll need some room to move... Come on. Blazers off. Let's see those hips!"

All eyes went to the council members in their midst for permission to take this radical step. Thad was stripping enthusiastically, while Wes and David slid their jackets off more sedately and went to place them with great care and respect across the back of a couch. This sight was met with a few shrugs before the rest of the group followed suit.

Once they were all settled and back in formation, albeit spread out to twice their normal size, Kurt smiled brightly and slapped his hands together. "Perfect. Today I'm going to teach you a routine that did wonders for the football team at my old school."

He reached out to wiggle a finger across the laptop's touchpad. The Dalton logo screensaver, projected on the screen behind and to one side of him, disappeared and in its place was the somewhat shocking image of a younger Kurt, dressed all in black from his skinny jeans to sequined vest and shiny tie over a figure-hugging leotard. Behind him on the screen were two teenage girls, also wearing leotards and not much else but high heels. Gasps and choking sounds permeated the room. Blaine's jaw dropped.

"Any questions before we get started?" Kurt was in choreographer mode. A hand went up. "Yes Aaron?"

"Um, who are the girls?" Several boys nodded vigorously at this excellent question.

"That's Brittany and Tina, two of my closest friends from my old school."

Aaron's hand was back in the air almost before Kurt had finished speaking. "Where is your old school?" Murmurs spread like wildfire, boys whispering to each other and pointing at the bare legs of the girls projected on the screen. "Also, a follow-up question, are they seeing anyone?"

Kurt's professional demeanor slipped for a moment at the utter lack of focus on the important issue of dance. He rolled his eyes and put his hands up to silence the group – a very effective technique here at Dalton that would have gotten wads of paper (at best) thrown at him at McKinley. "Tina and Brittany are both spoken for. Now, let's concentrate. I'm going to run through the routine once, then we'll slow it down and all try it together. Okay? Okay."

Kurt twisted around to hit play and the video started. He got into position as young Kurt started the music and Beyoncé's voice swept through the room. All but two of the boys' gazes were fixed on the projected image, occasionally glancing over to Kurt dancing in front of them, but for the the most part watching the girls. One of the other two boys, who would prefer to remain nameless because he'd only recently begun to question his sexuality and felt that it might be merely the effect of living at an all boys school, spent the entire time staring longingly at both Kurts.

The other was, of course, Blaine. His round eyes took no notice of Tina or Britt, choosing instead to stare intently at Kurt – and Kurt's hips – and only had trouble deciding which one to watch, virtual or live. Both were moving their bodies in a manner sure to cause his eye to twitch and his hand to inch nearer his groin.

When the routine was over, a smiling, happy Kurt turned his attention from the dance back to the group. "There," he said with breathless excitement. "I hope you were all paying attention. Now, I'm going to face away from you so you can follow my movements and we'll go through it slowly. Everybody in position!" Kurt turned and posed. "Ready? Here we go! And side – side..."

Kurt performed the dance in slow motion, with the Warblers actually watching the steps this time and clumsily attempting to mimic them. Blaine lasted about ten minutes, until a particularly violent thrust of hips and head to one side had him leaving formation and walking over to Kurt without ever consciously making the decision to move. He grabbed his boyfriend by the hand without slowing on his way toward the door, a surprised and giggling Kurt bounding along behind him.

"Okay! You boys use the video to keep practicing and I'll check on your progress tomorrow!" His laughing voice carried back to them from the hall as Blaine dragged him bodily out the door.

Wes cleared his throat, not entirely sure of the correct protocol when two of your fellow Warblers desert you mid-routine to have sex. But, Wes was a born leader and recovered quickly, stepping forward to start the video again.

Thad was still looking toward the door, a thoughtful expression on his face as his sharp mind schemed. He was revising and broadening his original sex tips hotline idea into 'Sexy Ed 101'. In addition to the helpful Q&A sessions he'd been trying to talk Blaine into, Thad was now thinking of web chats and dance instruction videos. Instead of charging by the minute for phone advice, or pay-per-text rates – small potatoes – he'd create a subscription website. Monthly fees would grant the subcribers access to blogs, FAQs, live and archived interviews and dance footage. It was brilliant! He started mentally drawing up a business plan. Blaine and Kurt would be adequately compensated, of course. Thad would always take good care of his employees. He'd draw up a contract and pay them a reasonable wage. He needed to talk to Blaine and Kurt right away! Oh, but now might not be the best time. He should probably wait until dinner. They'd love the idea, Thad was sure. They'd be Dalton celebrities and he'd be raking in the cash. It was a win win.

**The End**

* * *

><p><strong>AN:** All done! And they lived happily ever after.

No plans for another sequel at present. I'm moving on to another - hopefully shorter - fic idea. This one wouldn't be so long if my boys could keep their hands off each other! But who can blame them, really? Maybe I'll tackle Thad's scheme at some future date, unless someone else wants to take a crack at it. Lemme know.

I'd love some reviews to make me feel all warm and fuzzy, or give me an idea what I'm doing wrong. I know, too much sex, right?


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